If ever there was a way to make a guy interested in you without making yourself seem desperate, it would be flirting without actually flirting. Although this may seem like a difficult thing to do, it’s actually very simple and VERY effective.
Flirting is one of the best ways to let someone know you like them, but it’s also one of the most obvious ways. Most people can even go too far and make themselves look desperate for attention by flirting too much and in the wrong way.
To master flirting, you have to make it seem like you’re not even flirting at all. If you can do this, you can attract pretty much any guy you want. If you have no idea what I’m talking about or even how to flirt with a guy without really flirting, these tips will be extremely useful for you.
- Tease Him
I know it may seem rather elementary to tease someone that you find attractive, but it works just as well for adults as it does for kids. I know you remember making fun of your crush on the playground during recess as a kid. This is really nothing different, except you’re an adult and most likely in a bar. The trick here is to make sure you joke about something that’s not offensive. Joke about his choice of drink or about his ability to play darts.
- Use Your Eyes – a Lot
Your eyes are your magic tool when it comes to flirting without really flirting. They have the ability to make a completely platonic conversation REALLY flirty if you use them correctly. By this, I mean make eye contact, let it linger a moment longer than you normally would, and then pull away and look at something else. This shows him that you’re interested and it also makes him wonder what you’re thinking about.
- Don’t Forget About Your Hair
Girls, you have a very handy thing that can increase your flirting game without you even really flirting at all and that’s your hair. Even those of you with short hair have a means to use it in order to flirt. You can hide behind it, twirl is around, run a hand through it, and you can even let it fall in front of your face while you make eye contact with him. Using your hair to flirt is a very powerful way to send a message to a guy that you’re interested without being too obvious about it.
- Have Fun With it
Flirting is not mean to be taken seriously. It should be kept really light and really fun. In order to flirt without making it seam like you’re flirting, just have fun with the guy! If you keep things really fun and just joke about things easily, you’re already flirting with him. It’s a great way of making sure the conversation stays light and doesn’t drift into anything too dark or serious. Make him laugh and it’s the perfect way to flirt without flirting.
- Act Aloof
Don’t be too straightforward and talkative with him! If you really want to make your flirting seem effortless and like you’re not really flirting at all, just remain aloof for the majority of the time. This means to hold back and remain kind of distant at first. Basically, if he talks to you and tries to get you to tell him about yourself, be very vague and not specific at all. This will make it seem like you’re hard to get and he’ll try even harder to get you. A great move is to alternate being aloof with being forthcoming. He won’t know what’ll happen next!
- Stay Quiet
This is very different than being aloof. When you’re quiet, it means just to keep your voice down as if you don’t want anyone else to overhear your conversation. Not only does this create an air of intimacy, but it also makes him lean in close to you. It’s also a perfect way to make him feel like he’s the only guy in the entire building alone with you and that is sure to make it seem like a flirty atmosphere even if you’re not really flirting.
- Use Physical Contact
Touching someone else is a sign of comfort and even attraction. You may just be having a normal conversation with a guy but if you want to kick things up a notch and turn it into a flirty little fling, just gently initiate physical contact. It can be as much as just bumping into him a little bit or even just slapping him on the shoulder when he says something funny. Little touches do a LOT to make things seem flirty without really flirting.
- Single Him Out
There is almost nothing that will create flirty tension between two people like calling someone out in a big group of people. This is the perfect opportunity to flirt with him without even really flirting at all. Listen to what he has to say and then just ask him a question to further the discussion on his end. He’ll feel really special that you are actually paying attention and it will automatically put his attention on you. Bonus points if you maintain eye contact the entire time you ask the question.
- Get Caught Staring
This is usually something that happens on accident and then one party is super embarrassed about it. However, if you want to flirt without really flirting, all you have to do is get caught checking him out. When you’re looking at him and he starts to look over at you, let a slow smile plant itself on your face and turn away from him altogether. This will basically draw him to you in a matter of seconds. It’s also a really great way for those of you who are shy to get your flirt on without actually flirting face to face.
- Smile Only at Him
This is best used when you’re in a group and conversing with a lot of people. Sometimes it may be hard to not smile or laugh when something funny is said, so just keep in mind that this is for when you’re looking directly at him. You can laugh all you want at jokes and such, but when you speak to other people don’t smile at them. Then, when you’re actually talking directly to him, let your smile out. This is something that he may not notice, but it immediately sends a flirty message when he’s the only person you’re smiling at even though you’re not really flirting.
- Give Him a Subtle Compliment
Don’t be so obvious about your compliments. Telling him that he’s got really great hair or is super attractive is the wrong way to go if you want to flirt subtly. My advice would be to give an offhand compliment. This is something that may not seem like a good thing at first but after he gets time to think about it, he’ll realize that it was really a compliment. Something like, “that band doesn’t suck,” is perfect for this kind of compliment. Basically, you’re telling him that he has good taste in music, but you’re phrasing it in a way that’s not at all flirty on the surface.
- Keep the Conversation About Him
If you’re discussing topics about him when you’re around other people, then keep the conversation about him. This is a subtle way to flirt without actually fluttering your eyelashes or twirling your hair. Maintain eye contact when he’s talking about himself and keep turning the conversation back to him and do so in a way that shows you’re actually interested. From the outside, it might just look like you’re just talking. But to him, it’s really flirty because it’s all about him and what he likes and his interests.
- Make Him Look Good in Front of His Friends
If you want something that will make him come crawling to you every time he sees you, this is the move to make. Not only is this a way to flirt without even really flirting, but it’ll send a clear message to him and his friends. If he’s in a group with his friends and they’re all giving him a hard time or even just talking amongst themselves, find a way to compliment him in front of them. Making him look good in front of his friends will not be forgotten on his end.
- Lean Into Him When Talking
You may just be talking about something general and not flirty at all, but if you just lean in a little bit closer to him, it’s automatically flirty with really flirting at all. By moving in closer to him, you’re creating an intimate vibe that he’ll subconsciously pick up on immediately.
- Walk Away While It’s Still Fun
This is something the HARDEST of things to do but it, by far, has the best affect overall. When you’re flirting with him and it’s really fun and you’d want nothing more than to sit there and flirt some more, walk away. Leave him and go talk to your friends or get another drink or just leave the place altogether (assuming he has your number). This will make him crave and want you even more. It’s a way of flirting with him when you’re not even there to continue the flirting! He’ll keep wondering why you left and it’ll drive him crazy to the point of him seeking you out and finding you.
The biggest secret to catching a guy is flirting. But you can’t just flirt and make it so obvious because that’s not very desirable. Flirting without really flirting is the perfect way to snag a guy and keep him.