Bears are one of the cutest animals. They are one of the largest animals and come in many different varieties. Some bears eat bamboo and others hibernate during the winter. These bear puns are funny jokes and one-liners about all kinds of bears. If you are feeling beary punny, then these jokes are for you.
1. The reason that God made just one Yogi Bear is because the second one was a Boo-Boo.
2. Why is it so cheap to feed polar bears? Because they only live on ice.
3. What is a bear’s favorite soda? Coca Koala.
4. Why was the koala fired from his new job? Because he would only do the bear minimum.
5. What do you call a bear without ears? B’s.
6. Why couldn’t the cub work at the movie theater? Because he wasn’t koala-fied.
7. Why don’t bears use a pole to fish? Because they like to use their bear hands.
8. What do you call a bear that has been in the rain all day? A drizzly bear.
9. Why did the two bears break up? Because they were polar opposites.
10. Why don’t bears like fast food? It is just too hard to catch.
11. How do grizzly bears walk in the snow? Bear-footed.
12. What is a bear’s favorite type of dessert? Bear-y pie.
13. How do you start a bear race? You say, “Ready, teddy, go!”
14. How do you apologize to a panda? You bear your heart and soul.
15. Why did the father bear have to use his GPS? Because he lost his bearings.
16. What type of bear hibernates while standing on its head? Yoga bear.
17. Why is it so hard to work in a bear’s day care? It is just pure panda-monium.
18. What do you call a bear that doesn’t have any teeth? A gummy bear.
19. What side of the bear has the most fur? The outside.
20. What is a polar bear’s favorite snack? Brrr-itos.
21. Why do polar bears only have fur coats? Because they would look silly in ski jackets.
22. What do you call a freezing bear? A Brrrrr.
23. How do black bears stay cool during hibernation? With a bear conditioner.
24. What do you call a bear who is wearing earmuffs? Anything you want because they can’t hear you.
25. How do polar bears send their Christmas cards? By bear mail.
26. Where is the best place to find a grizzly bear? Wherever you found him last.
27. What do you call a polar bear on thin ice? A real ice breaker.
28. Why won’t the grizzly bear wear socks? He likes have bear feet.
29. How do you make a teddy bear? Take off his clothes.
30. What do you call a grizzly bear at the North Pole? Lost.
31. How did the koala stay in shape? With bear-obics.
32. Why can’t you give a bear the remote control? They always hit the paws button.
33. What do you call a polar bear that moved to Florida? A solar bear.
34. Why do polar bears love McDonald’s? They love getting berg-ers.
35. Why do Eskimos make round igloos? So that polar bears can’t hide in the corners.
36. Why do bears have great relationships? They know the value of koala-ty time.
37. How do pandas go on vacation? In a bear-o-plane.
38. What time is it when three bears chase you? Three after one.
39. What do baby polar bears eat for breakfast? Ice Crispies.
40. What is a polar bear’s favorite band? Seal.
41. Why was the teenage polar bear so excited? He was looking forward to the snow-ball.
42. What do you call a dream when grizzly bears eat you? A bite-mare.
43. Why did the bear cub do so badly in school? He was bear-ly awake.
44. Why do pandas love old movies? Because they are in black and white.
45. What do polar bears eat? A polar bear salad with snow peas and iceberg lettuce.
46. Why did the bear quit his job? He wanted to have koala-ty time with his family.
47. Where do polar bears keep their money? In a snow bank.
48. Why was the cub grounded? Because he told his mom a bear-faced lie.
49. Why did the girl dress her teddy bear in a spacesuit? He couldn’t dress himself!
50. How did the polar bear feel when he got off a plane in Guatemala? Em-bear-assed that he took the wrong flight.
51. What is the difference between a polar bear and a panda? About 1,000 miles.
52. What do you call a bear with a bad attitude? The bearer of bad news.
53. Why couldn’t the teddy bear eat dessert? He was too stuffed.
54. Why are grizzlies bad gardeners? They always make the landscaped bear.
55. How do you stop a bear from charging? Take away his credit cards.
56. What types of pie will a brown bear eat? Straw-bear-y, ras-bear-y, black-bear-y and cran-bear-y.
57. What does a molar bear do? Fight enamel cruelty!
58. Why are bald men and polar bears alike? Because they both have a white, great, bear place.
59. Why did the bear cub go to outer space? He thought that anything was paws-sible.
60. Why was the grizzly so proud of his hut? He built it with his bear hands.
61. Why did the bear have a gun? He believed in the right to bear arms.
62. Why are bears so picky? They Pooh-Pooh every idea.
63. What type of bear can fly? Peter Panda.
64. What happens when you mix a bear with a vegetable garden? Squash.
65. Why was the cub so terribly spoiled? His mother always panda’d to his whims.
66. Did you hear about the lady who fed an apple to a bear? It never beared fruit.
67. Why couldn’t the panda find his lunch? He was bamboozled.
68. Why did the panda cross the road? It was the chicken’s day off.
69. Why was Tigger searching the toilet? He was looking for Pooh.
70. What happens when you mix a harp and a grizzly? A bear-faced lyre!
71. What happens when you mix a pig and a teddy bear? A teddy boar.
72. What kind of vehicle does Winnie-the-Pooh drive? A Furrari.
73. Have you ever tried hunting bear? No, but I’ve tried it in my shorts.
74. What is as large as a bear, but has zero weight? The bear’s shadow!
75. What happens when you mix a bear with a skunk? You get Winnie the PU.
76. What does Yogi pack in his picnic basket? Only the bear necessities.
77. What does Winnie-the-Pooh call his girlfriend? Hunny.
78. What time is it when a grizzly sits on your bed? Time to get a new bed.
79. Why do smart hikers always go with a slow friend? So they don’t have to outrun the bear, just each other.
80. What do you call a polar bear in a phone booth? Stuck!
81. What do you call a rude koala? A bar-bear-ian.
82. Why can’t you hire a bear at work? They never have the right koala-fications.
83. What is a koala’s favorite element? Bearium.
84. Why shouldn’t you get in a fight with a bear? Because things will get grizzly.
85. Why are bears good at gardening? They know how to use a wheel-bear-ow.
86. Why do bears believe in civil rights? They want e-koala-ty for all.
87. Why do bear marriages last forever? They promise to stay together fur better or fur worse.
88. Where does a bear put his jacket? In his cubby.
89. Why did the bear get vaccinated? He was afraid of a panda-emic.
90. What happened to the bear who filed for bankruptcy? He became very paw.