Bone puns are a lot of fun and a good way to break the ice. These bone puns range from actual bone jokes to skeleton puns. You can use them as they are written or as inspiration for your own unique jokes.
1. Why don’t skeletons ever use cell phones? They’d rather use cell bones.
2. Why aren’t skeletons ever allowed to play church music? They have no organs.
3. How do you make a skeleton laugh? Just tickle his funny bone.
4. Why couldn’t the sleep skeleton get to work today? He was too bone-tired.
5. Why did the skeleton yell at Johnny? Johnny kept calling his little brother a numb-skull.
6. Make no bones about it. The skeleton is by far the best guy to be working in a bone yard. That’s certainly true.
7. On a recent trip to the local diner, the skeleton decided to order some spare ribs. That’s ironic, isn’t it?
8. Why did the skeleton love to play tic tac toe? Because they look like XO skeletons.
9. Did you hear about the school that had two skeletons as teachers? One was humerus, but the other was very sternum.
10. Why don’t you ever see two skeletons fighting each other? They just don’t have the guts.
11. Why was the skeleton always so calm? There was nothing that could get under his skin.
12. What did the manager say to the skeletons at his restaurant? Bone-appetit.
13. What do you call a skeleton snake? A rattler.
14. Why did the family stop inviting the skeleton over for dinning? Because all he ever wanted was ribs.
15. How can you unlock the door to a haunted mansion? With a skeleton key.
16. Why don’t skeletons mind the wind? It just goes right through them.
17. Why didn’t the skeleton like Italian food? He just didn’t have the stomach for it.
18. Why did the skeleton use all of his tax money to buy a motorcycle? He was just bone to be wild.
19. Why was work so hard last night? There was only a skeleton crew.
20. How do you imprison a skeleton? In his rib cage.
21. Why was the skeleton always looking for new friends? He was constantly bonely.
22. Why did they put the skeleton in jail? He was truly bad to the bone.
23. Why is it always so noisy in a graveyard? Because there was always a lot of coffin.
24. Why did the skeleton’s wife have to hang all of the holiday decorations? Her husband was a lazy bones.
25. Why did the band choose to have the skeleton as a new member? Because he could really rock out with the sax-a-bone.
26. What should you do if you see a skeleton dancing? Jump out of your skin and start to join him.
27. Why didn’t the skeleton come out to play last night? Because he had to bone up for the exam tomorrow.
28. What did the mom do when baby skeleton was picked on at school? She told the principal that she had a bone to pick with him.
29. What is the one instrument that a skeleton can play better than any other? A trom-bone.
30. Why did the baby skeleton need his bottle filled? It was bone-dry.
31. If you see my brother skeleton, you should tell him that I have a bone to pick with him. Me, too.
32. What do you call a skeleton who likes to ring the door bell on your home? A dead ringer.
33. Why did the skeleton climb up a tree? Because the dog was trying to get his bones.
34. Why couldn’t the skeleton lie to his parents? Because they could see right through him.
35. Why couldn’t the skeleton ask the pretty girl out on a date? He didn’t have any back bone.
36. Why did the skeleton have to go to the hospital? They had to remove his ghoul stones.
37. What do you call a skeleton who is always telling lines? A phoney-ba-boney.
38. Why couldn’t the skeleton eat the cafeteria at his high school? Because he doesn’t have the stomach for it.
39. Why shouldn’t you invite a skeleton to a barbecue? He’ll take all the ribs.
40. Why was the father skeleton so exhausted when he came home from work? Because he kept working himself to the bone.
41. Why did the old skeleton keep complaining? She suffered from aching bones.
42. Why are skeletons great with budgets? They are good at living on bare bones.
43. Why wasn’t the skeleton worried about the cops after he robbed the bank? He knew that they couldn’t pin anything on him.
44. And the winner of the skeleton beauty contest is . . . No body.
45. How did the skeleton fix his roof? With shin-gles.
46. How did the picky skeleton have to eat his food? Using bone-china.
47. Long ago, how did skeletons have their mail delivered? Through the Bony Express.
48. What do skeletons place above their dining room tables? Shin-deliers.
What is the skeleton’s favorite plant? A bone-zai tree.
49. Why do skeletons love pogo sticks? Because they can have a rattling good time on them.
50. How did the skeleton know that his mother had died? He just felt it in his bones.
51. Why should you never fight with a skeleton at a cemetery? Because it would be a grave mistake.
52. What happens when a skeleton stands too close to the fire? He turns bone dry.
53. What do you call an atheist bone? A blas-femur.
54. What is a skeleton’s favorite drink? Wine with a little body to it.
55. Why is it so hard to reassemble the bones of prehistoric animals? It is a truly mammoth undertaking.
56. What happened when the dog stole the skeleton’s foot? He was left without a leg to stand on.
57. Why did the skeleton quit the basketball team? His heart just wasn’t in it.
58. What was the skeleton’s favorite line from Shakespeare? Tibia or not tibia, that is the question.
59. What do you call an animal that is under the ground? A fossil, silly.
60. Why are skeletons always invited to parties? Because they are so humerus.
61. Why did everyone feel bad for the skeleton at the party? He had no body to dance with.
62. How do skeletons like to travel? On a skelocopter or a scareplane.
63. Why wasn’t the skeleton laughing? He had broken his funny bone.
64. How do skeletons have sex? They just bone each other.
65. Who was the most famous skeleton dictator of all time? Napolean Bone-a-part.
66. What did the romantic skeleton say to his pretty girlfriend? He loved every bone in her body.
67. Who is the most famous skeleton detective in the entire world? Sherlock Bones.
68. How did the skeleton watch Netflix? With his skelevision.
69. are skeletons always lonely? Because they have no body to love.