When you’re thinking about having a cuddle buddy, you probably don’t think of establishing any rules. Why would you need rules? Is something bad going to happen? It’s just cuddling. That may be your initial thoughts, however, as time progresses anything can happen. If you want to keep your friendship strong but still have them as a cuddle buddy, you two are going to have to make some ground rules. You may be thinking that you won’t have any emotions or feelings develop but we’re only human, so you can’t limit yourself and how you feel. With all this being said, you need to know the rules. That’s right, there are rules in place to help you ladies out. So, it’s time we showed you the 14 cuddle buddy rules that every girl should know.
Cuddling is just cuddling. They don’t need to have a sleepover and you don’t need to sleepover at their place. This isn’t what a cuddle buddy relationship is. That’s something more evolved and intimate. If this is what’s happening, you need to reevaluate your feelings. However, if you’re just starting a cuddle buddy relationship, don’t sleepover. This is a recipe for feelings.
Know what you really want
When you’re going into a cuddle buddy relationship make sure that this is really what you want. This isn’t a sexual relationship, so if you’re looking for that then go for that. You need to know what you really want. Doing something because you think that’s what you need is much different than doing something because you know you need it. So, sit down with yourself and think about what you really need.
Be honest with them
You need to be completely open with what you’re looking for in this cuddle buddy relationship. During the cuddling, you need to express to them what makes you feel comfortable and what doesn’t. Don’t be afraid to tell them what you want and don’t want. This is a mutual relationship, so you need to be able to freely voice your opinion.
Sex or no sex?
If you’re looking for a cuddle buddy, this means you’re not looking for a sexual relationship. If you want sex, then you’re looking for friends with benefits which is basically the same idea, however, with sex. If you two are starting to have sex, you need to have a chat and remake the boundaries. If you just want to go back to cuddling, you’ll need to find someone new. You can’t just have a platonic relationship with someone you’ve slept with.
Know when to call it quits
Maybe you two started completely platonic, however, after some time, you’re noticing that you’re starting to develop feelings or that they’re starting to develop feelings. This is when you need to pull the plug. This is always hard to do, however, it’s something you need to do. Feelings will only complicate the situation. Now, if you want to pull the plug, you need to tell them why. Be honest with them. Maybe they feel the same way, if not, find someone else to cuddle with.
Don’t cuddle with someone you’ve dated
If you’re thinking that cuddling with someone you’ve dated is a good idea, it’s not. It’s actually a horrible idea. Your exes are completely off limits when it comes to finding a cuddle buddy. You cannot just cuddle with someone you were sexually intimate with. It’s not going to happen. If you’re able to do this, well, then you deserve a gold medal. But as a general rule, you should simply stay away from your exes, it’ll only bring drama.
No date-type outings
Stay away from any date-like activities. If you’re going on dates with your cuddle buddy, well, then you need to see what this relationship is actually about. If this is just for cuddling, make it only for cuddling. If they’re asking you to hang out outside of the cuddling, you should be aware that maybe they’re looking for something more. So, if you want to go to the movies or out to dinner with them, you need to double check what this relationship truly is.
Know this will change your relationship
If you two were friends before, know that this will change your relationship. I don’t mean this is a negative light. It could change it for the better. You two could develop a closer bond or it could bring out emotions in both of you. But by cuddling with them, you have to know that this will change the dynamics of the relationship.
Don’t expect anything
If you like them more than a friend, you can’t expect them to know that. If you like them, you need to express that to them rather than making a cuddle buddy system. With that being said, don’t expect them to read between the lines and see that you actually like them. They can’t read minds. Don’t expect them to take you out for dinner and a movie. You made them a cuddle buddy so if you want different, tell them.
Keep your cuddle buddy away from family and friends
They’re probably great but you don’t need to introduce them to your parents and best friend. It’s not necessary. If you have feelings for them, then that’s different. But having them meet your friends and family may start to muddy the waters. People who introduce others to their families, it means something to them. You wouldn’t just introduce just anyone to your parents.
Keep your clothes on
Cuddling is great, however, cuddling half-naked is completely different. You need to keep your clothes on. If you’re laying beside someone who’s half-naked, I highly doubt that this cuddling session is going to end with just cuddling. So, keep the pants on. Keep the bra on. Keep it all on. You don’t have to cuddle with a parka on, but don’t wear your best lingerie.
Keep your hands where you can see them
You don’t need your hands under the blanket. That’s only going to lead to mischievous behaviour. When your hands are under the blankets, they wander, it’s natural. So, if you’re cuddling with this person, keep your hands where you can see them and vice versa. If your hands are wandering, you need to see if this is the right cuddle buddy for you.
Avoid overly sexual activities
Don’t watch an overly sexual movie. Unless you two are completely platonic, watching two people have sex on the big scene while cuddling is a recipe for disaster. Don’t go on any dates with them either. You need to keep this relationship strictly what it is, a cuddle relationship. There’s nothing more to it. Now, if you have feelings for them, that’s different.
If you actually want to date them, don’t have them as your cuddle buddy.
This may have sounded like a good idea when you were thinking about it, but it’s not. Making someone your cuddle buddy puts them in a non-sexual grey zone. Now if things start to heat up, which could happen, then you two are no longer cuddle buddies. But now, if that happens, you need to talk to them about what happened and what’s going to happen next. If you have sex with them, it’s not going to be easy or really possible to go back to being a cuddle buddy. But if you really like someone, starting off as cuddle buddies will only make things more complicated than necessary.
Now that you know the 14 rules for having a successful cuddle buddy relationship, follow them. They’re here only to help you have a safe and fun cuddle buddy relationship. Remember, you didn’t sign a contract, so you can do whatever you want. If you want something more or less than what you have now, express it and see what happens.