Emasculation of your male partner can be one of the worse things that you can do when you are in relationship. When you decide to join someone in a relationship you are making a commitment to support them and take care of them. The same goes for them. They have committed to you as well. Relationships are only successful when each partner involved has respect for the other. The relationship is simply set up to fail if that respect is missing. That is why is it so important to avoid emasculating the man in your life. Because when you do, you are throwing all respect right out the window as if it does not matter at all to you.
What Is Emasculation?
Emasculation technically means removing a male’s parts… If you know what we mean. However, in this case it means something kinda different, but based off of the original definition. When you emasculate someone you are taking away their manhood. Not physically, but emotionally and mentally. You might not be cutting of their actual balls, but you are making them feel less manly and making them feel like a coward.You are essentially taking away their strength, their confidence and their will to fight. You are demeaning them.
You might not think that is what emasculation always is, but it totally is. There is no other meanings behind it besides those two. You also may think that emasculating someone is harmless, especially if you only do it a little bit. That’s not true at all. Emasculation is very harmful to someone and to the relationship that you share with them. You are lowering their self esteem, even if you are just doing it little by little.
This is considered a toxic behavior. We recommend that you stop doing this immediately and start rebuilding your man’s confidence as soon as possibly. Otherwise we recommend that your man leave you and find someone who will truly respect him.
Things You Do To Emasculate Your Man
- You Dominate Everything
Emasculating your man starts by you deciding to take everything into your own hands. And we do mean everything. You stop letting him have a voice in decisions making. That is a problem on every level. Relationships need shared dominance or they will not work out. Unless you are dating a submissive man. If that’s the case, he might like it when you constantly dominate everything. However, unless that’s been previously established, it’s usually not what’s going on.
- You Are Ultra Critical
Are you constantly criticizing everything that your partner does? This is a great way to emasculate the person that you love. By being critical of everything and anything that he does, you are tearing him down and taking away his self esteem one notch at a time. Even if you have something negative to say, sometimes it’s best to just keep those things to yourself to save yourself from hurting your man’s feelings.
- You’re Demanding
Sure, sometimes it’s okay to take charge a little bit. However, being consistently rude and demanding is a whole different story. You should let your partner always have a voice. Treating them like a child by telling them what to do is never a good way to be in a relationship. Demanding they do this for you or that for you and not giving them any other choice is almost bordering on abuse.
- You Are Verbally Aggressive
Speaking of abuse. Being verbally aggressive towards your partner all of the time is a form of abuse. Verbal abuse is a very real thing and happens when you are trying to emasculate your man. Being rude to him purposely just to make him feel bad is on the list of verbal aggression. Calling him names or saying untruths about him to bring him down is, too.
- You Highlight Only His Failures
Everyone has failures. Even you. So that is why it is super important to remember that just because someone feels doesn’t mean that you should go mouthing off about those failures in an effort to make your partner feel bad. When your partner has a failure you should be there to give them a big hug and encourage them to try again. Not highlight it as if it was a success of some sort.
- You Are Arrogant
What do we mean by you are arrogant? We mean that you are constantly bragging and boasting about things just to torture your partner. You want them to feel inferior to you and that is why you have taken on this demeanor. You suddenly feel like you are better than him. When that happens it’s definitely problematic.
- You Make Rules For Him
Making rules that you insist your partner follow is a step in the right direction of totally making him feel like garbage. The only way that you should be making rules for him is if they are rules agreed upon by both parties in this relationship. However, if you are making them without his approval, you are being extremely controlling.
- You Bully Him
Emasculation comes in many forms, but one major one is when you bully your male partner. Calling him names, treating him like he doesn’t have emotions and essentially blowing off any needs he has is bullying him. Making him feel bad when he messes up or purposely trying to crush his dreams would also be considered bullying him. This is a great way to make him feel terrible about himself. And hopefully eventually, if you do this, it makes you feel bad about yourself in turn. No one should treat someone they love this way.
- You Give Attention To Other Suitors
A great way to make your partner feel awful and like they aren’t good enough for you is by giving your time to other people. Spending time with other males when you should be with your partner is a great way to make him feel unworthy. Flirting with people in front of him is as well. Like we said, mutual respect is extremely important. Trying to make your partner jealous or make them feel as if they are not good enough for you is wrong on so many levels.
- You Poke Fun At His Achievements
When your partner accomplishes something big, do you turn to immediately making it feel as if it wasn’t that big of a deal? That might be because you are subconsciously trying to sabotage his confidence. You want to make him feel like even when he does something awesome that it isn’t that great. That’s a terrible thing to do, but it is a way that you are emasculating him.
- You’re Always Making Comparisons
Constantly comparing your man to try and make him be better is awful and if you are doing it, you should feel ashamed. Just because there are better looking people out there or people who were better in bed, doesn’t mean you need to always remind him of so.
- You Pinpoint His Mistakes
Always pointing out his mistakes is a great way to make your partner feel like dirt. Everyone makes mistakes and when they do, they usually already feel badly about them. You are just pouring salt on the wound by bringing them up at every chance you get. Especially when you use these mistakes in an argument. You are surely going to drag his esteem through the mud by doing so.
- You Throw Things In His Face
We mentioned how you might bring up his mistakes in an argument. You may also bring up his failures or how he isn’t good enough. This is definitely an emasculation technique.
- You Have No Faith In Him
Not having faith in your partner at times is okay, but when you consistently don’t have faith in him and make him aware of it, it can become a problem. You need to believe in your partner most of the time to make a relationship work. Never believing in each other is a good way to let resentment build up.
- You Purposely Discourage Him
Your job is always to encourage your partner to succeed. Emasculating him would include always discouraging him. Letting him know that he isn’t good enough and that you don’t think he can accomplish anything on his own is a great way to bring him down. A healthy relationship is made up of supporting your partner no matter what and being there to cheer them on.
- You Ruin Sex For Him
You may be a little confused by this one and that is absolutely understandable. What we mean by this is that you stop putting effort into sex. You might tell him that he is terrible in bed or that others can please you better. You may even fake it in the bedroom, but make him aware that you are pretending. This is definitely a technique to emasculate your man.
- You Choose His Friends For Him
Being controlling is bad enough, but picking and choosing who he can and cannot hang out with is worse. Your partner should be free to hang out with anyone that he pleases. You might tell him that he can’t have friends that are girls or ban him from hanging out with a buddy you dislike. These are ways that you prove you are just being bossy and controlling. Your relationship will never work if this is how it is set up.
- You’re Always Questioning Him
There may be a time where partner is confident, but you are right there to question him at every turn. This is harmful to his confidence on a dramatic level. Sometimes you need to trust that your partner knows what they are talking about. Or as they say, ‘Take a leap of faith.’ Believe in your partner. Or else how do you expect them to believe in you in return?
- You Make Him Depend On You
You might be emasculating your man if you do everything in your power to make him depend on you and only you. You refuse to let him think for himself and instead make him come to you for thoughts and opinions. This is manipulation and should be abruptly stopped as soon as possible.
How To Change
Although you may not do all of the things that we have listed above, you might do some of them. Doing more than two on a repeated basis means that you are emasculating your man. You may not realize that was what you were doing, but we hope the list helps you realize it now. Don’t worry, though, you can change! Everyone can change if they are willing to put the effort in. You might save your relationship by reading and acting on the following tips on how to change below.
- Build Him Up, Don’t Tear Him Down
Instead of tearing him down, do your best to support your partner when he truly needs it. Don’t forget to tell him everyday how special he is and how much his effort is actually worth. Cheer him on when he needs someone to stand behind him. There is absolutely no reason that you shouldn’t be someone for your partner to always count on. This will help him feel loved and confident!
- Let Him Make His Decisions
You should really only be making decisions for someone if you are a guardian or a parent. Doing it for your spouse or boyfriend is a terrible and unnecessary thing to do. Let him make his own decisions and don’t say anything about them when he does. Always let him be his own person. It doesn’t make you any less of a couple.
- Treat Him With Kindness
The best way to rebuild someone’s self esteem is simply by being kind to them. Kindness is key. You should always be nice to your partner. You are supposed to love and care about them in every way possible. By exhibiting that love, you are letting them know that you believe in them.
- Appreciate The Things He Does
Appreciation goes a long way in letting your partner know how important they are and regaining their trust. It’s key in any relationship to show mutual appreciation. It let’s them know that you understand all of the hard work and effort they put into the things that they do isn’t easy.
- Make Sexual And Emotional Intimacy A Priority
Don’t fake intimacy. Period. Be authentic in everything that you do with your partner at all times! It’s the only way to be happy with him.