When you meet the perfect guy, you want to be around him as often as possible. Nothing is more disconcerting than meeting the right guy and then suddenly having him disappear on you. You know that you want to date him again, but he hasn’t responded to your texts recently. It has now been a few days, and you are starting to wonder if he really wants to date you after all. What is going on and what should you do about it?
He Hasn’t Texted in a Few Days. Why and What to Do About It
There are a number of reason why he might not text for a few days. One of the biggest reasons is that he is just busy. Work, school, family responsibilities and hanging out with his friends take time. He might not have a spare moment to message you. This is especially true if you just started dating. Later on, there is more of an emotional commitment in the relationship and he feels like he has to message you whether he is busy or not. In the beginning, he may feel like it is perfectly fine to text you every few days or so when he has a moment. The emotional commitment isn’t there yet, so he takes care of the other parts of his life when he has the time.
This reason is also more likely to be the case if it has only been two or three days. A lot can come up in just two or three days that can make him too busy to message you. It doesn’t mean that he doesn’t like you, but he may not have time to think about it for the moment. If it has been four days or more, the chances of busy-ness being the reason starts to go down with each passing day. It is unlikely that a guy who was unable to text for two weeks was busy that entire time. Barring some crazy situation like a death in his family or a mother in the hospital, no one is so busy that they can’t text once a week.
There are other reasons why he might not text as well. If he hasn’t texted in a a few days, he might just hate texting. Some people prefer talking to their friends, family and dates in person. If he has never been much of a texter, then this is probably the reason why. He doesn’t realize that you read into his texts (or lack of texts). He just assumes that he should text you when he wants to meet up with you again, and he doesn’t have time yet for another date. If all of his other behaviors make it seem like he is really interested, don’t assume that he has lost interest just because he hasn’t texted in a few days.
The final common reason for this is the one that hurts the most. It is entirely possible that he just isn’t interested. This is not necessarily a reflection on you or him. Perhaps he only wanted a fling and knows that you would want more. He may have realized that your personalities would clash down the road. He may not be interested in women with long fingers, short fingers, giggly laughs, whispery voices or whatever other adjective you want to throw in there. It is not a reflection on you if he is not interested. For relationships to work, you have to fit together like puzzle pieces. If one of you realize that you are not the right puzzle piece right away, it saves you a lot of time and stress.
What Should You Do Now?
First, try to figure out the most likely reason why. No matter what though, give it about 48 hours before you message him. If you text too much without getting a response, it will make you seem needy and clingy. Wait 48 hours, and then send him a short message like, “Hey, how’s everything going? :)”
Don’t send another text until he replies. This is the hardest part. When you are waiting for someone to text you, you keep checking your phone over and over. You start to wonder if you offended him or if you said the wrong thing. Don’t second guess yourself. Send the one text and then turn your phone on silent for a few hours. You have a life to live, and waiting around for a text that may or may not come is boring.
If he responds and seems like he wants to keep the conversation going, text him back. If he keeps his response short and simple, do the same with your response. Some people dislike getting into long-winded texting conversations, so keep this in mind. If he never responds to your texts, then you can probably bet that he wasn’t interested and wants to move on. Forget about him and focus on yourself. There’s no point in wasting time and effort dwelling on a relationship that won’t work.
Don’t fixate on whether he texts or not. He hasn’t texted in a few days, but there are many reasons why this could happen. All you can do is send a text after a few days just to see how things are going and then accept whatever the response is. You can’t force someone to like you and panicking about whether he texts you or not will get you nowhere. Enjoy your life, move forward and don’t stress about his response.