After a relationship ends, moving on can be extremely painful. For most people, it takes at least a few weeks to really start to feel normal again. If you dated someone for a long time or loved them deeply, it can even take months to move on. You want to forget about the past and start living your life, but you find it impossible to get over an ex-girlfriend. While the biggest factor is time, there are other things that you can do to speed up the healing process.
How Do I Get Over an Ex-Girlfriend?
The biggest thing that you can do to get over an ex-girlfriend is give it time. It took time for your feelings to develop, so it will take time for them to go away. You can speed up the process a bit, but it will still take time. While it feels difficult to be patient, this is the best thing that you can do.
As you heal, remember that you are not in a position to start a real relationship again. You can date, but you need to tell your dates that you just got out of a relationship and do not want anything serious. If you try to commit to someone now, there is an excellent chance that they will only be a rebound girlfriend. A new girlfriend does not deserve to be just a rebound, so let her know in advance that you can only handle a fling and aren’t emotionally ready to date.
The first few weeks after a break up are the hardest. When you date someone, your life becomes tied up in theirs. You go to the movies together, enjoy the same hobbies and spend a lot of your free time together. When you break up, you suddenly have all of this time to kill that used to be spent with your ex-girlfriend.
You can’t just sit at home and think about her. If you want to move on, you have to literally get moving. Find a new hobby or spend more time with your friends. Spend some time working out or reading a good book. If you stay busy, it will be easier to keep your mind off your ex-girlfriend. You won’t be able to move on if you spend all of your time dwelling on the past.
Remind Yourself About Why You Left
You’ve heard the saying that the grass is always greener on the other side? This is especially true for break ups. Before the break up, you may have been terribly unhappy and wanted out. Within a few days or weeks after the break up, you find yourself thinking about all of the good things in your relationship. All of a sudden, it sees like your only memories are happy ones and you have forgotten all of the bad ones.
If you don’t want to drive yourself insane, you have to remember that there was a reason why you broke up. Write down all of the reasons why your relationship would not have worked out. When you find yourself focusing on just the good memories, read this list. There are reasons why you broke up with her, and you need to remind yourself of them.
Accept the Past
You have to accept that the relationship is over before you move on. Your girlfriend may have been the right person at the wrong time or the wrong person entirely. Whatever the case, give yourself a break. Until you can accept the past and present, you cannot start creating your future. For a relationship to actually last, you have to be with the right person at the right time.
Reconsider Being Friends
Every time you see or think about your girlfriend, you immediately want to hold her again. This feeling will not help you heal. Some people can be friends with an ex, but there is no reason that you have to. Even if she pushes you to be friends, you have to do what is right for you. If seeing her as a friend means that you can’t move on, tell her that. You might want to delete her from social media and stop hanging out with her entirely. If you keep seeing her and talking to her all the time, it will be very hard for you to move on. If you are worried about hurting her feelings, explain this to her. Then, delete her and move on. You have to focus on you right now, and she is no longer your girlfriend.
Don’t Think About Getting Back Together
If you want to move on, you have to remove any hope that you will get back together. You broke up for a reason. On-and-off-again relationships rarely last forever. In most cases, they just drag out the pain and stress of a break up. You have to face the truth that the relationship is over and start moving on. It isn’t easy now, but healing will happen if you give it time.