When you think that you have found the perfect girl, you are ecstatic. It seems like everything is going perfectly, but something seems slightly off. Perhaps she does not seem quite as into you as she seemed at first. Or, she suddenly disappears and stops responding to your texts. At some point, you start to wonder if she is actually interested. You want to learn how to know if she’s leading you on. If she is, you want to move on and stop bothering her.
Before you even answer this question, you really have to consider her behavior. There is an excellent chance that she is not interested, but she is not intentionally trying to lead you on. The entire problem is how society—and guys—expect ladies to act.
Currently, our society raises women to be kind and polite in all situations. Chances are, she has tried to reject a guy outright before so that he does not feel led on. He probably responded by calling her a b***** or something similar. Because of experiences like this, she has learned the hard way that she cannot just reject a guy outright.
Unfortunately, this leaves her with very few options when a guy has a crush on her and she is not interested. If she just tells you outright about how she feels, then she is afraid that you will get angry at her or call her names. Instead, most girls go for the middle ground. Instead of telling you how she feels, she is polite and nice. She smiles, says hello and answers your questions, but does her best not to flirt with you or do anything to make you genuinely think that she cares. Unfortunately for you, her smiles give you hope. You think that she might be interested, so you are even more crushed when you find out that she is not.
She is stuck between a rock and a hard place. If she is a nice person, she does not want to lead you on. She is just afraid of how you will react to her rejection. Before you assume that she is being a jerk and leading you on, you should consider if she is just trying to be nice.
Is She Leading You On?
In the majority of cases, the girl does not realize that she is leading you on. She is either afraid of your response or wrongly thought that you were interested in being just friends with her. There are a few select occasions when a girl will intentionally lead you on. The mentality that goes into this is the same as guys who are players and who keep multiple ladies waiting in the wings as potential options.
Someone who intentionally leads a guy (or girl) on wants the ego boost. They want to know that they are attractive to the opposite gender and your attention makes her feel good about herself. She may also want to have the option of dating you. You might not be her first option, or she may be just waiting for a better option to come along. Either way, she is leading you on to keep you as a backup plan and to boost her ego.
There are also times when a girl will lead a guy on just because she is not sure about how she feels. She is not entirely sure that she is interested, but she is also unsure if she is not interested in you. She cruelly keeps the relationship going as she decides if you are the partner she wants in life.
What Are The Signs She Is Leading You On?
1. You Are Never a Part of Her Future
As you talk to her, you bring up the future together. Perhaps you mention a vacation dream or discuss your life goals with each other. Whatever the topic, you are never a part of her dreams. This is especially true if she has major dreams that involve moving to a distant place. She might not be intentionally leading you on because she might not think you are far enough into the relationship to really decide on changing her future plans.
At the same time, there is an excellent chance that she does not see a future for your relationship if you are never considered a part of her future. She never accidentally mentions how nice it would be to take a vacation together or go on a hike as a couple. At best, she sleeps with you and maybe brings up the idea of getting dinner together. You are not a part of the future in her stories because you have not become a part of her future in her mind either.
2. She Is Less Interested as Time Goes on
At first, it seemed like she was totally into you. Maybe you slept together or just went on a couple of dates. After each time you were together, she seemed less and less attracted to you. This might be because she was leading you on, or she might just realize that you are not right for her as she got to know her better. Right now, she might be trying to find a way to be honest with you without totally breaking your heart.
3. She Says That She Does Not Want to Be Attached
This is a clear sign that she does not want a long-term relationship with you. If she says that she does not want an exclusive relationship or does not want to be attached right now, then she does not see a future for the relationship. This isn’t a problem if you just want a casual fling, but it will be an issue if you want something more out of the relationship later on.
4. You Only Hang Out on Her Schedule
It is completely understandable if she cannot hang out with you because of an appointment with her mom or because of her work schedule. There is a point where it can become too much. If she is only texting you for a booty call on the weekend, then she is definitely leading you on. If you were important to her, she would see you at other times as well. When she only considers you as an option, then she doesn’t care about what works best for your schedule.