When you fight with your girlfriend, it can feel like the relationship is entirely over. Thankfully, if you play your cards right, this does not necessarily have to be the case. You can learn how to make her miss you after a fight, and she will hopefully decide to return to you.
Why Does She Need to Miss You?
If you do not miss having someone around, why would you want to be with them? More importantly, this technique is probably one of the best things that you can do. If you become clingy and text her constantly, it will only push her farther away from you. By learning how to make her miss you after a fight, you get her to start thinking about all of your good qualities and why she wants to be in the relationship. As long as you don’t do anything that pushes her away, this should work if any part of her wants to be with you. If she is genuinely through with the relationship, you don’t have to worry about doing the wrong thing because nothing you could do or could avoid doing would change the situation.
1. Avoid Being Clingy
This is the most important rule on the list. When your relationship is going well, wanting to be around your girlfriend is a good thing. After a fight, the same behavior could make you seem clingy. She needs space to cool down and heal from the fight. If you constantly text and call her all the time, she won’t have that space. Worse still, she will start to see you as an obligation and a boyfriend who she really doesn’t want in her life.
2. Stay Positive
Do you like being around people who are always gloomy and unhappy? If you are like the majority of people, probably not. She is never going to miss you if you spend each moment together moping about the fight or angry because she has not gotten over it yet. If you want her to miss you, you need to remind her of just how great you are.
This means that you need to be upbeat and positive when you do get to be around her again. If you are always in a good mood around her, she will feel happier. Before long, she will associate these positive feelings with you. She will feel drawn to you because she likes how positive she feels when she is around you.
3. Avoid Getting Jealous
After a fight, it is fairly normal for a girlfriend or a boyfriend to want a night out with their friends. They naturally want to relax and blow off steam. Are you worried that guys will hit on her when she’s out on the town with friends? Absolutely. If she was amazing enough for you to date, other guys would have to be incredibly dumb not to make a move. With that said, guys hit on her all the time. She doesn’t respond to these advances because she loves you and wants to be with you. That won’t change because of just one fight, so relax and give her a chance to unwind.
The worst thing that you can do is be jealous about what your girlfriend is doing or where she is going. If you text her a dozen times while she is at a bar with her friends, she is going to feel suffocated. If her friends notice all of the texts, they might even suggest that you are not the right guy for her. Basically, being jealous will always backfire, so don’t do it. If she loves you, she will come back to you and all of your worries will be for nothing. If she has chosen to stay with you, the only thing that will push her away is you.
4. Slow Down on the Calls and Texts
How can you miss someone if they are still there? Impossible, right? If you are texting her and calling her constantly after a fight, she will never have a chance to miss you. The fact that you are looking up this article shows that your fight was more than a run-of-the-mill argument about socks on the floor. Clearly, she needs a little space to cool down. While you should never play mind games in a relationship, holding off on a few texts is not playing a mind game. It is giving her the space and thinking time she needs to recover so that she can be a loving, amazing girlfriend again.
There is a caveat to this, however. If she texts you, don’t ignore her forever. Ghosting someone and the no-contact rule will not make her miss you. If you stop talking to her entirely, she will actually heal and move on. You have to find a careful balance where you are still responsive to her, but you give her a little extra space. When you do get to be around her, make sure it is a positive experience that shows how much you care. That way, she will start to miss all of the amazing qualities that you bring to the relationship.
5. Give Her Some Space
After a heated argument, it is easy for your emotions to get away with you. The same thing goes for her. She might have said things or done things that she did not really mean. You need to give her some space so that she can process the argument and have a chance to see your side of things. Let her cool down. Once she is calm again, she can start to remember why she loves you so much and how unimportant the argument really was.
When all else fails, don’t be afraid of breaking up. Essentially everyone will go through at least one break up before they find their future spouse—and about half of people will still go through a break up after that. If you two cannot get over an argument and learn to see things from each other’s point of view, it might be an indication that the relationship just won’t work for the long run, and that’s okay. Until you get to that point, give her some space to miss you. After that, the outcome is up to both of you.