When you are in a relationship with someone, you naturally want him to respect you. Without respect, you can never have a real relationship. Luckily, there are a few ways for you to learn how to make him respect you. With the right approach, you can make sure that your relationship gets off to the right start.
1. Don’t Compare Yourself
When someone has a low self-esteem, they often compare themselves to other people. You might talk about how you wish you had thinner legs, larger breasts or something similar. This type of attitude will rarely win you respect. It only reminds him of any potential fault, and he probably never noticed the fault before you mentioned it. At the very least, it will make you seem too superficial to actually deserve respect.
2. Stay Positive
Obviously, you might have dark times or bad days sometimes. For the most part, you should try to stay pleasant and positive. You want to be the type of person he wants to spend time around. If you are always negative, then it will only make him respect you less.
3. Don’t Do Everything He Says
Listening to your partner is a good thing, but being submissive is not. You will never be treated as an equal unless you act like it. If he is in a bad mood or demands you to do something unreasonable, call him on it. You don’t have to be mean about it, but you definitely should not do what he says just because he wants you to. Show that you have a mind of your own and be willing to take control.
4. Challenge Him Sometimes
No one respects a pushover. If you always give in during arguments and are extremely submissive, you will seem like a pushover. You don’t have to (and shouldn’t) challenge him on everything, but you should stand up to him sometimes. Stand up for what you believe in and want. If you do it right, it will actually make him respect you more.
5. Don’t Be a Cry Baby
Some ladies cry to get their way because they know that their partner will just give in. While this might help you get your way, it will not make your partner respect you. Crying all the time makes you seem insecure and weak. If you can’t even handle a simple argument with him, how could you possibly handle life on your own? You have to act in a way that deserves respects if you want to learn how to make him respect you.
6. Recognize His Good Qualities
When someone does something nice, they just want a sign of gratitude. Many people do not feel like they get the respect, gratitude or attention that they deserve. By showing your thanks when he does small things like the dishes, you set up a relationship where he feels respected and appreciated. In return, he will be more likely to show his gratitude and respect for you.
7. Remember to Put Yourself First Sometimes
A strong person knows how to stand up for themselves and fight for what they want. At the same time, a good person will generally do their best to help other people. While helping other people is always good, you also have to remember to take care of yourself. If you cannot respect yourself and your own needs, no one else will respect you either. Likewise, you need to put your guy first sometimes. If you always put your family and friends before him, he will not feel like you respect him.
8. Don’t Make Excuses
People who deserve respect still make mistakes. The only difference is that they know how to own up to their mistakes. If you always make excuses, then it will only drive your guy away. You have to show that you are accountable to your mess-ups and your successes if you want your date to think that you are worthy of respect.
9. Don’t Be Afraid to Make Mistakes
Too often, people confuse respect with success. They think that they have to be perfect at everything if they want to get the respect of the people they love. In reality, even the most successful or well-respected people make mistakes. You have to be willing to show that you are human and make a mistake now or then. Once you do make a mistake, make sure to learn from it.
10. Follow Through on Plans
No one respects a flake. If you constantly make and break plans with your boyfriend, he is never going to respect you. Respect has to be earned by always following through on what you say you will do. Obviously, there may be an exception from time to time—if your mother gets in a car crash right before your date starts, he will understand. As a rule though, you should always follow through on all of your plans with him if you want to make him respect you.
11. Rethink Your Makeup
Makeup is fun to wear when you go out, and it is a chance to create a fantastical version of yourself. At the same time, it can give the wrong impression. Everything you wear represents who you are. Athletic shoes and yoga pants make people think that you are a runner or a yogi. A flowing dress and wavy hair may make people think that you are a hippie or an environmentally conscious individual. A short skirt and pounds of makeup? Probably not the look you want to go for if you expect him to respect you. There is nothing wrong with makeup, but keep it to a minimum. If you want him to respect your mind and your personality, you do not want to be overzealous in your application of makeup.
Wearing a significant amount of makeup sends a message that you value how you look above your other attributes. If you combine it with an overly revealing outfit, then it amplifies the message. There is nothing wrong with this if that is the message you want to send—after all, some careers like fashion explicitly encourage a strong focus on the superficial. At the same time, it will probably not win you a lot of respect points at first.
12. Be His Partner
If you want your date or your boyfriend to respect you, he has to see you as his equal. Don’t be his one-night stand or short fling. Instead, focus on setting yourself up as an equal. Be open to enjoying a hobby together, going on a hike or playing video games at home. People respect their best friend or partner in life. If you want him to respect you, then you have to be more than just a short fling.
13. Show Him Respect
Have you ever noticed that you tend to dislike people who dislike you? Even if they have qualities you would normally like, you start to dislike them because you feel like they don’t like you. The same give and take happens for respect as well. If you get the sense that someone does not respect you, it makes you less likely to respect them. If you want your boyfriend to respect you more, you have to show him respect. He is never going to respect you unless you also respect him—and if you can’t find it in yourself to respect him, then you probably shouldn’t be dating him anyway.
14. Be Independent
There are guys who just want a trophy wife, but you obviously don’t want to be just that. You searched for “how to make him respect you,” which means you want a relationship that is based on respect. Trophy wives might be admired by their husbands, but they aren’t respected in the same way that an independent, confident woman is. If you want your guy to respect you, then you have to be independent and self-reliant. Find that perfect balance where you get to spend time together, but you can both have girls’ nights and guys’ nights on the weekend without it being a problem.
15. Skip the Tantrums, Manipulation and Mind Games
Someone who deserves respect says what they want and can have an open conversation. Throwing a tantrum to get your way, playing mind games or trying to manipulate your boyfriend will never, ever earn you respect. If you have ever watching a friend throw a tantrum or play a mind game, think about how you felt. Did you respect her more or less afterward? The same goes for your relationship. Your boyfriend is not a mind reader, and it is also safe to say that he generally wants to make you happy. If you really want something to happen, just talk to hi about him. Trying to manipulate him in any way will only push him away from you.
As a general rule, act like the people that you respect. Most likely, the qualities that you respect in other people will also make him respect you.