When you like someone, even texting can be intimidating. You want your crush to like you, but you are afraid of seeming too demanding or needy in your texts. Once he has agreed to go out with you, your next step is to make plans with a guy over text without driving him away.
If you want to get the guy of your dreams to go on a date with you, you have to play your cards right. With a few simple texting tips, you can make plans with a guy and get your dream date.
1. Be Definite
When you are making plans via text, you have to make your plans fairly clear. Otherwise, you could be playing the back and forth game of text tag for hours. Instead of saying, “What time works for you?” and getting a “Whenever works for you,” in response, suggest a time to start out with. He can always say that a different time works for him, but this allows your texting conversation to get an instant answer. If you leave things too up in the air, he could end up not responding to your next text, going to sleep or forgetting that you texted. Give a clear time and a place. He can always suggest a different option, but you might be able to head-off a long-winded conversation about which time or place works best.
2. Don’t Seem Too Needy
Many dating advice guides suggest that you should wait a day or X hours before texting him back. While there is some truth to this, you don’t have to always follow these rules. For his initial text, you might want to wait at least a few minutes so that it doesn’t seem like you are too needy or desperate. Once you are actually texting back and forth about your plans, respond right away. It takes time to text back and forth, so make sure that you respond fairly quickly. Otherwise, you may end up running out of time to make plans with your guy before you actually planned on having a date.
3. Be Specific
Don’t just text your guy, “Do you want to do something this weekend?” You should reference a specific date idea. This makes your texting easier, and it also makes it easier for him to know how to respond. He can immediately know if he is actually free and if the date idea works for him. Your texts should start with your plans. He might run out of time or get distracted later in the conversation, so start your discussion off with the plans you want to make. Afterward, you can always have a texting conversation once you are agreed on the plan.
4. Don’t Do Just “Hi” or “Hello”
We have all gotten this type of message before. A friend is bored and messages, “Hey, what’s up?” If you are also bored, you probably responded or tried to figure out something to do together. If you were busy, you ignored the message with the goal of answering back later. If you are like most people, you were too busy later on to actually respond.
If you just send your guy a brief, “hey,” he might not remember to respond. At the very least, this is a generic, dull message. It means that he has to put in the work to think of a creative answer, and it makes him feel like he is not important enough to warrant even a full sentence. This type of message is too easy to ignore, so don’t do it.
5. Don’t Be Pushy
You really like him, so you want him to respond right away. More importantly, you want him to say “yes” and agree to meet you. Unfortunately, these desires can cause you to seem pushy. When he does not respond right away, you text him over and over to see if he got your message. You are worried that you offended him or that he is ignoring you.
If you have never really talked a lot in person, keep your texts sparing. You don’t need to have a long conversation via text. Don’t worry if he doesn’t seem interested in talking via text that much. Many people prefer in-person conversations, so be willing to make your plans and then wait for the date to have a conversation. If a texting conversation starts, that’s fine. Just don’t force a conversation if it does not start naturally.
If he texts you back right away, go ahead and respond. If he only sends short answers, give it a rest. He might just be busy or he might not be interested. If he is interested, he will re-initiate later on. If you are unsure, give it a break for at least a day before you try to text him again. Once you have made your plans, you’re set. You might want to send a “looking forward to seeing you tomorrow,” right before the date just in case it slipped his mind.