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How To Start A Text Conversation With A Girl

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So you finally have a girl in mind that you’d like to start texting. However, you might be a little bit nervous. We get it, starting a text conversation with someone isn’t always as simple as we’d like it to be. There are certain guidelines that you should be following when it comes to texting anyone, but there are even more specific rules you should use when it comes to texting a girl that you like! Read below to find out what they are.

Get Her Digits

First and foremost you should work on getting her number from her. You can’t really start a texting conversation with someone if you don’t obtain their phone number first. How do you accomplish this? Well, you have to woo her first!

This means taking your time getting to know her in person.

Don’t just straight up ask her for her number. That’s a little bit crass, don’t you think?

Talk to her a little bit.

Then ask for a way to communicate with her. She may just have you add her on social media and that also works for starting a text conversation in the future.



Ask her, “Would it be okay to shoot you a text?”

That way you know if she is truly interested in talking with you later on.

Otherwise you might just be wasting your time on a dead end.

Think Of Who She Is

You might want to think carefully about whether or not starting a conversation with her is worth it. This is especially true if she is someone that you do not know, have just met or barely know.  Why? Because sometimes sending a text can lead to some hardcore rejection and it’s up to you to decide if it’s going to be worth the trouble or not.

Thinking of who she is also gives you the opportunity to figure out the best way to start up that conversation.

If she is an old friend, you can use that information to contact her.

Hey, Sarah it’s Jack from the dorm, remember me? We used to have Chemistry 112 together.



Saying a piece of information such as that will make her feel more inclined to respond to you.

Maybe you two were previously co-workers or used to attend a lot of the same parties.

We suggest using that information when igniting the convo with her!

Plan Out Everything

Be careful about planning your first text. You don’t want to do it too rapidly and regret what you said. Once you hit that send button you cannot delete it! So plan, plan and plan some more! What are you going to say? How are you going to peak her interest?

A good way to do that is by using humor. Don’t be crude and don’t be dirty with your jokes, but it never hurts to get her laughing a little. Girls like guys who are funny and she will probably want to text you back if she thinks that you are funny! You can google a joke or think of one on your own to include in your first paragraph that you are planning to send.

This type of perfect text definitely takes some time to map out. So think carefully!

Make A Good First Impression

You never know how many other guys might be hitting up her inbox at the same time. You want to stand out. First impressions are everything, but your first impression was probably given when you were asking for her number in the first place. We don’t mean that first impression.

Texting has a first impression of its own. Meaning she is going to get a second look at who are by reading this one text. This is when she will decide if you are someone she wants to talk with or not.

Try using only good grammar and spelling. Being lazy can lead to leaving a bad impression on her. Women can be ultimately turned off by bad spelling, grammar and lack of reading comprehension. So do your best to avoid making those mistakes right away. Even if you aren’t the best speller, take time to autocorrect everything that you can!

Don’t Be Boring

You want to catch her attention. You can’t do that by simply saying, “Hello.

She is not going to want to reply to that. What would there be to say to that anyways besides “hello” back? Why would she want to do that. She might feel as if she is just wasting her time doing so and move on to the next guy who has been trying to talk to her.

But Don’t Be Overwhelming

You want to make a good impression and you definitely don’t want to be boring. However, you don’t want to come on too strongly! Overwhelming her by writing too much or being too invasive will only push her away from you. You want to keep things exciting in your first text, but you don’t want to overpower the simple greeting by explaining too much right away. You want to take your time letting her get to know you. You do not want to spill all the info you can immediately! If you do, what reason does she have to continue a conversation with you?

Also Don’t Be Too Obvious

Don’t make it obvious that you are romantically interested in her right away. She might be shy and think that’s a bit too much for a first text. You don’t want to give it away that you are looking to pursue something with her. Girls don’t like guys who throw themselves at them. Have you ever heard of playing hard to get? Do that, but do it over text.

Remember that you don’t want to be too hard to get. Just make it appear as if you are simply trying to gain her friendship first. She will appreciate that.

Keep It Clean

In other words: Do not be a perverted freak! If there is anything that turns women off it’s being a total creep. Especially over text messaging. Don’t use any crappy, corny, pervert written pick up lines. Don’t mention her figure or her beauty initially. Take your time complimenting her. Don’t talk about your physical features or why she would enjoy you sexually. No one wants to hear that right away! Unless she is looking for a straight hook up. Which, unless she texted you first, we can guarantee she isn’t.

Yes, we know you think she is attractive, hot, etc. But keep it in your pants and be a gentlemen for now. Women prefer that much more. We promise!

Focus On Her

When the conversation starts you can now pour all of your focus on getting to know her. This will ensure that the conversation keeps going and that it keeps going smoothly! She will enjoy the fact that you are taking time to get to know her instead of getting to know her physique.

Women and men are a bit different when it comes to dating.

Most women need to experience some sort of emotional connect with a person before they express any sort of romantic interest in them.

That means that you have to put in a little work to let her know you are willing to take your time and establish that emotional connection with her.

Don’t Be Afraid Of Emojis

We don’t mean to go crazy and send a bunch. Keep the emojis limited, but it’s certainly okay to use them!

Try to avoid using hearts right away or winky faces. Instead use smileys and other such emojis to show your expressive towards her.

Using too many emojis, however, can turn her away from the conversation. This can seem childish and even annoy some people greatly.

You should first monitor to see whether or not she is an emoji user. If so, go ahead and use them right back.

Do not use the wet symbol or the eggplant.

Again, you don’t want to come off as a creepy horndog.

Ask Lots Of Questions

The best way to keep a text conversation going is by asking a ton of questions! Nothing gets her more interested than by playing a simple way of 20 questions. You want to open the doorway of communication and also give her an opportunity to let her talk about herself. Asking questions also almost always guarantees that she will ask questions about you in return. This gives her a chance to get to know you as well. Who knows, maybe the more she gets to know you, the more she’ll grow to like you!

Try Not To Be Persistent

People get busy. So it’s important to remember not to bother her too much if she hasn’t replied in a while. Avoid being a jerk if she doesn’t respond to your last text. Give her time to get back to you. We know that your feelings might hurt a little bit if she blows you off for a few hours. However, it’s not the end of the world! You never know what is going on in someone else’s life. She may just not know you well enough to feel obligated to tell you what she is doing every second of the day.

Flirt Your Heart Out

Once you get things flowing smoothly, you can now start flirting. Don’t be gross, though! Keep it PG! Compliment her. Try complimenting her on something other than her looks.

Remember The Timing

So maybe she stopped replying entirely. That is okay. There is no need to panic… Yet. Timing is everything when it comes to talking to someone through text. Try to get her to let you know the best times to contact her.

When she hasn’t responded you can go ahead and send out one more text.

Keep it simple by asking another question or inquiring to see if she is busy with something else.

If she doesn’t respond to that text, wait twenty four more hours before sending another. This makes it seem like you are still interested, but you don’t come off as desperate that way.

Know When It’s Time To Quit

If she doesn’t respond to you after the last text, know that it is time to quit. Not all text conversations lead somewhere. Better luck next time pal!

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