Guys, let’s have some real talk here: you miss your ex girlfriend. Society wants to teach guys to be tough and to not have the same soft feelings that women have, but that’s just not realistic. When you get together with a woman and share intimate moments and time with her, you’re going to have fond feelings that are hard to shake if or when you break up.
That’s just natural! A lot of guys won’t admit that they’re feeling hurt or lonely when they break up with their girlfriend. But men have just as many emotions as women do, whether or not they want to hide it. Guys, if you’re having trouble getting over your ex girlfriend, just know that it’s a completely natural reaction. Fortunately, there are ways to focus on getting over her, rather than focusing on how she’s no longer there.
1. Admit it
The only way you’re ever going to work on missing your ex girlfriend is if you admit it to yourself that you miss her in the first place. You may be tempted to swim in the river of denial, but nothing is going to work out if you can’t admit it to yourself.
If you find that you’re more frustrated, anxious or upset in the days and weeks following your breakup but you can’t figure out why, you may want to sit down and have a long talk with yourself. Admitting that you miss her is the first step to being able to let go of those feelings and get your life back.
2. Get back together
This is only a choice if the both of you want it, if you realize that breaking up was a mistake, and you want to work on the issues that cause the relationship to fall apart in the first place. Getting back together with your ex isn’t the end all be all solution to getting over that missing feeling.
Sure, you won’t miss her anymore, but it’s not worth it if you’re just going to end up breaking up again. In fact, if you get back together too hastily just because you don’t want to be alone anymore, the following break up could possibly be worse. Don’t get back together unless you’re sure that the both of you want to work on the issues and problems that you had, and want to make the relationship work.
3. Keep busy
You may be tempted to check up on her and see how she’s doing, but that’s not going to help how you feel. The best way to get over missing your ex girlfriend is to keep yourself busy. Hang out with friends, go for a run, play video games, watch a movie – do whatever you have to do to keep your mind occupied.
Pick up new hobbies. If there’s something you’ve always wanted to try, now is the time to do it! You can even take that trip you’ve been thinking about, or that vacation you’ve been craving. You’re going to find that a lot of your spare time is spent thinking about your ex. Whenever you seem to find your mind wandering in her direction, do something else to keep your mind busy.
4. Think about yourself
Now is the perfect time to get a little selfish. You’re the most important person in your life right now. Even if you’re missing your ex girlfriend, you have to remember to take care of yourself. Now might be a good time to start dating yourself, as if we’re.
Treat yourself kindly, go out to the movies, order in. Allowing yourself to treat yourself kindly can really help getting over that sad, missing feeling. Instead of trying to snap yourself out of it, be softer with yourself than you might normally do. Do what’s best for you, not what you think will get you back together with your ex.
5. Give her space
Would you want your ex constantly checking up on you, sending you messages and blasting notifications to your social media? Probably not. So, make sure you do your ex girlfriend the same courtesy. The best way to get over her and stop missing her is to make sure that you’re not constantly trying to get her attention.
If you don’t give her space, you’re not going to be able to give yourself space either. While you may be tempted to check up on her social media, resist the urge! Delete your text conversations and unfollow her from social media, at least for a while. If she’s ready to talk to you again after the break up, she’ll let you know! In the meantime, you both need the space in order to sort out your thoughts and feelings.
6. Keep your eye on the prize
Long term goals are a great way to keep your focused on the more important things in life. Missing your ex girlfriend can feel like the whole thing that matters in this moment, but that’s not true. If you focus too much on missing what you had, you won’t ever be able to look forward to what you could have.
Are you where you want to be in life? Is your career making you happy? Do you have a goal you what to achieve? Keep your goals in mind and keep your eyes on the prize. Focusing on the future will make it easier to stop dwelling on the past.
7. Put reminders away
Delete those old emails. Erase your text conversations. Stop looking at the hair ties and bobby pins she left behind. Put away the last shirt she left behind at your house. Reminders are only going to make it harder to get over missing her and force you to stay focused on the past.
Tuck away those reminders so you’re not drawing into that feeling of longing every time you walk by them. Your home should be a place where you can relax from your day to day worries – there’s no need to make it a shrine to one worry in particular. Remembering the good times can feel nice for a minute, but it will only make moving on even harder. Once you put away the reminders, you’ll find it easier to stop missing her.
8. Meet new people
Sure, it may feel tempting to just hang around inside all night rather than going out, but you have to get back on the proverbial horse at some point. Don’t be afraid to go out, meet new people and start to move on. Filling your day to day life with new people and new experiences will make it easier to stop focusing on how much you wish one particular person were still in your life.
If you’re having issues missing your ex girlfriend, then going out and meeting new people can be just what you need. And who knows? Maybe you’ll meet a girl who makes you forget about her all together.
9. Talk to your friends
Don’t underestimate the power of having a support system! You may not want to admit to your friends that you’re feeling this way, but they probably understand way more than you’re giving them credit for. It’s okay to reach out to someone and talk when you feel like you need it.
Getting your emotions out can be extremely therapeutic, even without seeing a therapist or a counselor. Reach out and find your support system. Even if you’re not talking about what’s bothering you, just having someone to talk to can make it easier to deal with missing your ex.
10. Work it out
As in, work out! Exercise can be amazing for the body, especially when the body is feeling a lot of stress and anxiety. If you’re still not sure how to handle the feelings that are buzzing around inside you over the break-up, hitting the gym will help release good hormones and break down your stress.
Not to mention, your body will be healthier. Working out can also be a great place to just let your thoughts go. You probably won’t be thinking about your ex girlfriend while you’re in the middle of a hard core workout.
It may not be fun to admit it, but if you’re missing your ex girlfriend then you have to confront it. Pretending that you don’t care will only get you so far. Thankfully, the best way to get over your ex girlfriend and free yourself of missing her is to confront it head on, and find ways to get your mind off of the situation. You may find it easier to just keep yourself busy, doing new things and meeting new people.
Or, talking to someone about it and discussing your feelings may be the technique that works best for your. However you choose to overcome your feelings, it’s important to know that more guys know what you’re going through than you know! Once you overcome your feelings for your ex, you’ll be able to go out and find someone who you can spend your life with.