When you are dating a guy, you expect him to only focus on you. You want him to be loving and caring, and it seems like he is fulfilling his side of the bargain right now. The only problem is that he always follows hot, random girls on Instagram. You are not majorly worried yet because he does not actually know the girls or talk to them. At the same time, you are worried that this could be a sign of a major problem later on. Should you be worried?
It seems like it is hard to find the perfect guy. You think that you have found the one, but then he has a large amount of hot, random girls on Instagram. You are not entirely worried about what he does in his private time, and you are not exclusive yet. At the same time, you are worried that he does this so openly. Most guys who want to see a pretty face turn to porn in their free time or have erotic magazines. Yet, your guy flaunts his attraction to the world.
Should You Be Worried?
Some guys do this because they are not that mature yet. If he is single, then it might not be anything to worry about. He might just like to see all of the beautiful pictures and imagine what life would be like if he could find a woman like that. If he is in a relationship with you, then he might not be mature enough yet to realize that it could hurt his relationship. If this is the case, then just let him know that you feel uncomfortable about it. If he cares about you, then he will stop following the girls on Instagram.
While it might not be anything to worry about, it can be embarrassing to date someone who follows hot, random girls on Instagram. All of your friends can see that he follows these trashy accounts, and he is supposed to be your boyfriend. Instead of focusing just on you, the entire world can see that he is checking other women out.
It can also be troublesome depending on why he is following these ladies. He could be doing it because he objectives women or has a misogynistic attitude. Perhaps he sees women as just sexual objects that are there for his pleasure. If this is the case, then you have every right to be worried. If he does something else in your real life that makes you think that he does objective women, then you definitely want to move on to a new boyfriend.
Is It the Same as Checking Women Out?
Even when you are married for years and years, you still notice that the opposite gender is attractive. After all, we are all just human. The question is whether you act on it. In happy, committed relationships, both partners have the self-control to look, but never touch.
Some people have argued that liking or following attractive, random girls on Instagram is just the same as checking a girl out as she walks by. Some guys have even said that it is even less of a problem because he doesn’t actually know the girls.
Personally, I think that this is untrue. When you see a pretty girl walking by, you don’t tap her on the shoulder and tell her how pretty is. You just look and then look away before she sees. When you see an attractive woman online, it should be the same response if you are actually doing the same thing. You see a pretty picture and keep scrolling. He is actually following the girls, liking their photos and potentially interacting with them. It might “just” be online, but it is actually a step past checking a girl out. He has moved to the interaction phase when he likes, comments or follows her. Most likely, it is just a fantasy and she will never return his affection, but this does not matter. The desire is there, so it is something to worry about.
It is not strange at all that he would be attracted to hot, random women. While it might not be strange, it is a potential problem. If you have just started dating, let it slide for now. If you are not exclusive in real life, then there is no reason why he can’t check out hot, random women on Instagram—and it is quite a bit better than playing the field in real life.
If you are in an exclusive relationship with him, then it is something that you have to address. Don’t get angry at him because he probably does not realize that he is doing anything wrong. Talk to him about how you feel, why it worries you and ask him to unfollow the women. If he wants to fantasy about strange women, he can buy erotic magazines. He doesn’t have to interact with women who actually exist and might respond.