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Do Some Guys Really Give Up on All Relationships With Women?

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Whether the man was recently divorced or has had bad experiences with women, there are sometimes reasons why guys give up on relationships completely. In some cases, guys are anti-feminist and just hate women. In other cases, they went through a bad break up and just don’t want to put their heart out there again.

In nations like Japan, there are actually entire movements where guys just give up on dating entirely. In these nations, it is actually becoming a problem because the country needs enough babies to be born to support the retired population. When part of the population refuses to marry and have children, it becomes a practical problem. In the United States, we don’t really have that problem. While there are some guys who give up on women, there are not enough guys doing this for it to really affect the birth rate.

Why Would Some Guys Give Up on All Relationships With Women?

There are many potential reasons why guys might give up on women. While some of these involve past experiences with women, there are many other reasons that this could happen.

1. High Stress

This stress could be from work, societal responsibilities or a past relationship. If the guy is in a stressful job and works constantly, he may not have made a conscious decision to give up on women. His biggest issue is that he just does not have time for a relationship. Even if he tries to date, his partner feels lonely and left out because he is constantly busy. After experiencing a break up because of his work, he may just put off dating until some day in the future when he actually has time for it.

2. High Standards for Men



In the United States, there are more women with bachelor’s and graduate degrees than men. While most women do not mind marrying someone who has a lower degree level than them, the guy may mind. He may feel like there is no one on his level to date, so he gives up. If he has a self-esteem problem, then dating a woman who is out of his league may make him severely unhappy. Because of this, he may just give up on dating women entirely.

3. Traditional Roles

Some guys want a woman who can be a housewife and cook their dinner each night. Traditional roles are changing, so there are many, many women who want to have a career. If the guy just wants a housewife, he may not be interested in dating anyone who cannot fit this standard. On the other side of the coin, there may be guys who want a woman who is a go-getter and career oriented. If he can’t find a woman who matches his drive, he may give up dating women entirely.

4. Past Trauma

Our early experiences in life can greatly shape who we become. If the guy was betrayed by his mother or never had a strong female in his life, he may feel like other women will be equally disappointing. Even though a logical part of his mind realizes that this cannot possibly be true, he can’t get over his past childhood trauma and move on. Because of this, he can’t date anyone or can only trust a partner after years of her proving that she will not just leave him like his mother.

5. Divorces and Breakups

A divorce is one of the most traumatic things that you can experience. It ranks just after a death of a loved one in stress and emotional turmoil. If someone has gone through a bad divorce or a bad breakup, then they may give up on women entirely. While they know that the next person they date may be different, they just cannot take that risk anymore. They know exactly what it is like to lose everything in a divorce, and they don’t want to take that risk again.

6. They Were Cheated on



At some point, most people have been cheated on before. Some people are able to heal and move on, but other people just can’t. The cheating may have been with a trusted friend or it may have been a long-term affair. Whatever the case, the guy cannot move past it. Even if he tries to date someone again, he finds it impossible to let his guard down and trust a woman.

7. He Hates Women

While the other reasons are more common, it is also possible that he just hates women. He may have had bad experiences in the past or he may have been cheated on. In some cases, weaker-minded guys fall for the rhetoric of hate groups and anti-feminists. In these cases, they develop a deep-seated hatred of women that is hard to break. In addition to making the guy stop dating women, it also means that he is probably not someone that you should ever date. Even if he tries to get over these feelings, it can take years. These subconscious thoughts and biases can hang around for years, even if he is consciously trying to get rid of them.

8. Expectations Are Changing

Most people realize that cat-calling is not an acceptable way to hit on women. Making someone feel uncomfortable or in danger is never a good way to flirt. Unfortunately, some men do not realize that they can still flirt with a woman. They may be afraid of hitting on her because they are worried that she could say it was non-consensual or sexual harassment. Even when these views have no basis in reality, the guy may still be worried. Gender roles are constantly changing, so it is easy to become worried about what you can and cannot do. Knowing the proper way to make a move isn’t easy for everyone, and this causes some guys to give up altogether.

There are many potential reasons why a man may give up on having relationships with women. Unfortunately, most of these are related to deep-rooted views that take time to change. Until the guy is willing to change on his own, he may remain an undesirable date.

12 COMMENTS

  1. I don’t hate women, i absolutely love women! But, i am divorced, single for 18 years, and at 46 have begun to realize i will never date anyone again.

    • Allow this decision to have a positive influence in your life. Treat everyone that you meet with kindness and compassion. You can avoid from developing strict relationships with people. You may find that there are people who are looking for similar things that you are searching for. Have a great day, Mike!

  2. I’m divorced and I must say, it was very traumatic for me (and the kids too). I don’t know if I’ll date again, but I’ll never “live with” (cohabit) or marry again. I have dated maybe three or four times since the divorce, in about a 3 month window, but never really got into it. At my age (mid forties) dating seems like some sort of twisted job interview where I get to pay for dinner. I’ve stopped dating and because I’m a single dad whose resources (money, mostly) go towards the ex and my kids, no women are interested in me anyways!! This is really a blessing. I think relationships are highly over-rated and present WAY too much risk for the man and nothing but perks and benefits for the women. I know feminists talk about “emotional labor” and all this nonsense, but I can’t pay utility bills with emotional labor – it takes cold hard cash. I just feel that in my life right now having a woman in it would cost 10x more than it’s worth, with 10x more risk, financially, than I’m willing to take. That’s why I’m single. That’s why I’m MGTOW. I don’t hate women, but I really don’t like most of their behaviour. So I’m out of the “dating/mating arena”. I know people will have strong opinions about that, but the BEST part of being MGTOW is that IDGAF!!!

    • It sounds as though you have made a decision that makes you happy. It is great that you have chosen to focus on your children instead of focusing on developing a new relationship. Continue to make positive decisions. Do not allow this previous relationship cause you to treat people poorly. Treat everyone in your life with kindness and compassion. Have a great day, Sid!

  3. I’m pretty much there. I know I don’t try often enough but I tend to fall hard and get my heart walked all over. It’s just not worth it. I feel like I can either not care at all about the person and at least have company or actually care for once and walk away alone.

    • Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings. Allow this experience to guide your future actions. Treat everyone in your life with kindness and compassion. There is no need to develop a relationship with someone that you are not interested in developing a relationship with. Take this time to look inward and determine what you want for your future. Have a great day, Stef!

  4. I’m 23 and I have completely given up on dating. I would say it’s a mixture of the above reasons, I don’t hate women, and I consider myself feminist. But I also feel worried about when and how to hit on women (as I mostly only meet them in a professional capacity or at law school). I’ve been through several terrible relationships in the past, and they have left me feeling like I’m just not what any women are looking for.

    • Take this time to look inward and determine what you want for your future. Allow the thoughts of these previous relationships to fade. Treat everyone in your life with kindness and compassion. You do not need to develop a relationship with anyone at this time. If you find that your feelings change with time, then make a new decision at that time. Have a great day, Cody!

  5. The one and only girl I ever perused romantically lied to me and led me on for over a year for her own personal gain. She claimed a friend of her’s had broke into her house and raped her. Me, believing her and wanting to help her, wanted to do everything I could to help her heal and feel better. She took complete advantage of my feelings for her, used me, took all my money, change jobs, loose said job, had me cut of contact with friends and family. After a year she saw how ragged, depressed and sick I was all the time and admitted to me, by text, that she had made it all up to get back at her ex. She then cut off all contact with me.

    It’s been years since then. I’m objectively in a worse state in every aspect of my life for having met her emotionally, socially, financially, etc etc. I’ve taken all the advice there is under the sun. I’ve improved myself, gotten in shape, worked on my, focused on other aspects of life. And don’t tell me to get professional help, that’s a catch phrase people who don’t have mental illness or trauma parrot as advice. Been there, done that.

    Nothing helps. It’s been years and I still can’t get over allowing myself to trust someone and have them lie to me over something as serious as rape. I have no recourse. I can’t talk to her to get closure since she wont talk to me without her saying I’m stalking, I can’t bring up anything legally despite all the savings I lost because technically no crime was committed, I can’t talk to anyone to work this out because at best I’m told to just get over it and at worst I’m made fun of.

    I’ve done so much to move on. I’ve taken all the advice there is five times over. I’ve been rejected by more people than others have met in a life time and I don’t say that as exaggeration or to boast.

    I think about killing myself every day.

    I think tonight should be the night.

    • You will not find rejection here. You may find benefit in speaking with someone at a suicide hot line. If you do not want to speak with someone there, then take this time to look inward. This person has harmed you, but you are in charge of your life. There is no benefit in harming yourself. She is outside of your life, so attempt to put her out of your mind anytime that you realize that you are thinking about her. You do not need to establish a relationship with anyone at this time, and you may find benefit is focusing on your mind at this time. Most importantly, treat everyone in your life with kindness and compassion, as this will bring positive influences into your life. If you have no family or friends in your area, then perhaps move to a location where you can enjoy old friendships with people that you can trust. Have a great day, Danny!

  6. I think we’re all in the same boat. I meet and date women, talk for a while, then it ends. Realistically, I think society is a problem. “You’re single? Why are you single? Aren’t you dating anyone? There is just so much pressure in America to date or be married. Maybe I like my freedom? Maybe I like money to myself? Maybe I want toys rather than women? We’re not freaks or horrible people. But at some point you realize dating sucks, relationships don’t work for you, and you just don’t work well with the opposite sex. Personally, I like sport cars!

    • Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings. You are right, culture changes as the generations change. It is possible for successful relationships to be developed, and people nourish any relationships that they are in. Have a great day, Jon!

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