Whether you just started the perfect relationship or have been in a relationship for years, there are certain things that you expect from your partner. While you don’t expect compliments all of the time, you do want to hear a “You look pretty,” every once in a while. You compliment your boyfriend, so it only makes sense that he would do so in return. While you assume that he finds you smart, attractive and fascinating since he is dating you, you would never be able to tell because he does not tell you anything.
My Boyfriend Never Compliments Me: What Is Going on?
There are people who use language in ways that are different than ours. Have you ever read about the languages of love? Some people express their love through gifts, compliments or through their actions. There are different ways to show that you love someone. When your boyfriend never compliments you, it might not be due to a lack of love. It might simply be that he does not use language and compliments to show his feelings.
To determine if this is the case, you have to look at the rest of his behavior. Does he show up when you make a date? Is he there for you when you need him? Does he show that he cares through other ways? If he shows his love in other ways and you know that he loves you, then there is nothing major to worry about. All you have to do is talk to him about how you feel.
Some guys are shy or do not know what to say. Create a list of the types of compliments you like to hear. Then, give him the list. Explain that you want to feel like he loves you. You could also point out that you are more interested in sex when you feel like your partner is sexually attracted to you. If he is like most guys, he will want to give you compliments once he realizes it makes you more likely to sleep with him. Don’t get angry at him because your entire goal is to let him know how you feel and get him to start complimenting you.
He Could Be Shy
Even if he does not seem shy normally, he may be reserved when it comes to compliments. Perhaps his parents were the types of parents who just expected him to do the right thing and never verbally rewarded him for it. If he was raised in a home where compliments were not the norm, then he may feel unnatural trying to give you compliments. It has nothing to do with you and entirely to do with what he is used to. Even if you talk to him about how you like compliments, it might not make a major change. His compliments could always seem forced because he is just not used to giving them.
Should You Ever Be Worried?
There are only two main situations where a lack of compliments could mean something. The first is in emotionally manipulative relationships. If you are dating a narcissist or someone who wants to control the relationship, he may avoid giving compliments because he does not want you to feel good about yourself. He tries to keep you down because it makes him feel good.
The second situation where you might be worried is if he is thinking about a break up. A lack of compliments only matters in this scenario if he used to give you compliments. If he suddenly stopped giving you compliments, then it could be a sign that he is thinking about a break up. It is also possible that he might just be busy though, so don’t assume too much right away.
It Could Be Due to Insecurities
Are you awesome? If you are an attractive, intelligent woman, then he might feel intimidated by you. He might secretly think that he does not deserve you at all, and he is hoping that you never realize it. While he might not realize it, his lack of compliments could be due to his insecurities. He is afraid that you will realize that you are too good for him if he constantly compliments you. Most likely, his lack of compliments is not even conscious. He subconsciously realizes that you are too good for him, so he is trying his best to keep you from realizing it.
Ultimately, the bottom line is that a lack of compliments does not mean a lack of love. In most cases, your boyfriend does not realize that you feel hurt when he does not compliment you. He may feel uncomfortable complimenting you, or he may be afraid that you will realize that you are too good for him. Whatever the case, your best bet is to just talk to him about how you feel and ask him to use compliments to express his feelings as well.