Being with another person is usually one of the best feelings. You build this amazing connection with someone that you haven’t been able to find with anyone else. You make each other feel good and raise each other’s self esteem (hopefully). You have someone to share your happiest times with, but also someone to share your darkest times with. But even though you are happily living life with someone else, does not mean they are always necessarily happy. That is not saying that they are not happy with you, but they might not be happy in general. These are the type of people that we consider to be a little bit broken. Why do we call them broken? This word fits the many ways that someone may have been worn down by life events, relationships or mental illness. Being broken does not mean that this person does not love you nor do they want to be with you. However, it can mean that they have a more difficult time doing so than someone who isn’t considered to be a broken person. So how can you tell that you are dating a broken man? What are some signs that give it away? Keep reading and you will soon find out.
Sign #1: Low Self Esteem
More often than not people who are a little bit broken inside have severely low self esteem. They may not even realize that they have low self confidence either. But it will be obvious to those around him. You might notice that he has a hard time getting his self esteem up on his own. He might say things like:
‘I’m always making mistakes.’
‘I’ll never be good enough.’
‘I don’t know why I even try.’
These are the types of things that people say, not always looking for attention, but because they truly believe them when they say them. This is a sign he needs to work on his confidence levels and start believing in himself. And it is the most definite sign that you are dating a broken man. Someone who is not broken might not have the greatest self-esteem, but they certainly will have enough to the point where you won’t notice they get down on themselves.
Sign #2: Unresolved Trauma
Unresolved trauma is pretty common among a majority of the population. But most of the time they go out of their way to try to resolve the trauma at some point. A broken man might never take the initiative to do that. He feels as if there is no way to really deal with his trauma or at least he has not gotten up the motivation to try to deal with it entirely. This may be because the trauma was severe and came from his childhood. It could also be trauma from a previous, or several previous, relationships. Have you noticed that the man you are dating has trauma he does not like to discuss or confront? This would be a major sign that you are dating a broken man.
Sign #3: There Are Lots Of Bad Days
And not only will he isolate himself some days, but he will also lash out and get sad. There will be days that he will be a rollercoaster of emotions. This can wear you and him both down. There seems to also be more bad days than there are good days.
Sign #4: Not Always There
Another sign that you are dating a man who is broken is that they lack the ability to always be there for you. This means that they are not always a great shoulder to learn on in times of need. They might not realize that you are seeking their attention. Or they could be so caught up in their own stuff that they don’t feel like they really have time for anyone else’s stuff. This can be hard on the relationships and will need to come to a resolution if the two of you are going to work out. You will need to let him know that he isn’t always there for you and the strain that it’s causing.
Sign #5: Doesn’t Open Up
A broken man will most definitely have a hard time opening up! This is one of the biggest signs that someone isn’t completely whole inside. They have a hard time wanting to open up to people. Even if that person is the person that they love most in the entire world. When you prompt him to discuss personal matter, like his past or his feelings, does he shy away? Does he close himself off to you? This is most definitely something that signals he is a broken man.
Sign #5: There Is Isolation
Broken people tend to have days where they isolate themselves. Even from their partners. You might notice that if you are dating a broken man he has times where he cannot be around anyone. He might say that he is busy or that he just doesn’t feel like hanging out. He may tell you that he needs some time alone. This is because he is having a hard time coping with life that day and doesn’t know how to be around people.
Sign #7: Anxiety And/Or Depression
A broken man is definitely going to have either anxiety or depression. And they will be apparent in his behavior. You may notice that he is easily overwhelmed or stressed out. You may take note of the fact these things interfere with his everyday life. He might not realize this, but you definitely will. These types of mental illness are pretty common in everyone, but a broken person will let them run wild and not even notice!
Sign #8: Badly Formed Relationships
The last sign we have that indicates that you are dating a broken man is that he will have a hard time with relationships. Not just yours, but all relationships. Does the man you are dating have bad relationships with his family members? This could be a sign that something serious has happened between him and them previously. Which would lead him to be broken in the first place. Does he have nothing but bad things to say about friends? This could be because he has not formed the greatest relationships with them in the beginning.