Guys are complicated creatures. They have a way of knocking a girl right off her feet and then leaving her cold and alone. Just when she gets used to the cold, he walks right back up and offers her a warm fire. It’s so confusing that girls are typically left with their heads spinning trying to keep up with his latest mood.
One of a guy’s favorite moves to knock a girl off balance is the cold shoulder. They like to pretend that women are the complicated ones that play mind games, but guys have an entire playbook of them and women hate mind games. Also, if a woman is thinking of giving a guy the cold shoulder, it’s normally because he did something idiotic. A guy just does it to see what happens and to force you into being the submissive one. At least that’s what it always seems like.
In order to figure out why guys decide to give a girl the cold shoulder, or block her suddenly, I went out and asked a few guys to explain their odd behavior. Hopefully this will help us to understand what is going on in their minds so that we aren’t so damn confused anymore. Here are the responses I got:
1. He got what he wanted from you and doesn’t care to see you anymore. This is well-known as the old hump ‘n dump. If a guy is only after one thing and he gets it, he has no use for you anymore. That is, unless a time comes around that he wants to get it again and then he’ll suddenly come back around.
2. He is no longer interested and doesn’t want you digging around in his business. There is normally a confrontation of some sort before this happens like a break-up, or an argument. Or maybe you know he was just cheating on your best friend and he doesn’t want that info leaking.
3. He is confused about his own emotions and is taking a break from you to figure them out. This is okay because it is better for you if he figures them out before getting you involved in any way. There is nothing worse than getting with a guy and then figuring out that he isn’t sure about his own intentions. He could also be really into you and confused about his reactions to you.
4. He needs space and time to think. In order to have that quiet moment, he took you out of the picture. This is not necessarily a bad thing. He could be trying to figure out if he’s ready to propose, or if his head is in-line with his heart.
5. He is following bad advice to try and get you to miss him and realize your feelings for him. This is one of those mind games that men pull. Why not just ask you how you feel about him? No one really knows. But this is one of his go-to moves to have you eating out of the palm of his hand. It’s the old trick of calling you every day and then waiting you out to see if you’ll go to him.
6. He is trying to prove a point to you. Yes, it’s yet another mind game. Perhaps you disagreed with something he said and he is now trying to get the point across that if you don’t agree with him, he won’t like you. Blocking you is his way of shutting you out until you beg. Don’t beg.
7. He disagreed with you about something and doesn’t know how to talk to you about it, so he just cut off communication instead. This is pretty childish, but we have all done it in one way or another at some point. The blocking will probably only be temporary since the two of you will eventually forget about the whole disagreement.
8. He is tired of seeing your status updates about your meals, your workouts, and everything else that you are doing. Some people prefer simplicity and constant updates clog their feeds. Don’t take it personally; just shrug it off and move on.
If you get the sudden cold shoulder from a guy, at least you’ll have a few ideas about what could be causing the odd behavior. Just figure out if he’s worth it to you to go through the trouble of deciphering his reasons and getting him back. If he’s not, then just let it go and move on with your life. If you think he’s playing mind games, run in the other direction because he sucks and you don’t want to deal with that in your life. If you like him and think he’s worth it, then just ask him what’s up. It’s the easiest thing to do.