Guys seem to enjoy throwing girls off their game. It’s like they wait to figure out what would surprise you and then try it to see if it works. Like it’s a game of Trouble or something. One of those surprise moves is to give you a call at three in the morning when he is completely wasted. Why would a guy do that? Is he hoping that you will invite him over? Has he been secretly crushing on you for months? Should you even answer?
Since it is impossible to know what he is calling for when you see his name flashing across your screen, unless it is a regular occurrence, we have decided that the best way to help you figure him out is to ask other guys about it. So, we went out and surveyed some guys to see why they tend to make late-night drunk calls. Some of their answers may actually surprise you. Here they are:
1. He is seriously hoping that the conversation will lead to “you want to come over?” That’s because he is only calling you to see if you are willing to hook up with him while he is drunk. Normally, this is a guy from a past relationship, or someone you were interested in but the timing never really worked out. This is a booze call booty call so be prepared for him trying to bait you in for the night.
2. He has been wanting to call you for weeks but couldn’t get the courage to do so until he used a little liquid courage. You will know this is the case because you will have picked up that he was into you and the conversation will be easy going and he will ask questions about your personal life, without them being sex related, and actually talk about himself in the same way. He is trying to create a baseline for when he’s sober.
3. He misses you and wants to talk to you. If you’ve been friends for a long time and he just calls while he’s drunk to catch up and reaffirm your friendship, then he just thinks of you as a really close friend. He’ll say things like “if anybody ever messes with you, I’ll kick their butt.” The conversation will feel like you’re talking to your big brother and best friend at the same time and you will actually enjoy it. The next time you talk, you’ll have something to pick on him about too which will work great in your friendship.
4. You are already in a relationship and he is calling when he’s drunk because he wants to talk to you. Be prepared for premature emotional confessions with this one because he is likely to blurt out the L word long before you’re ready to hear it. The alcohol removes his inhibitions so he’ll say things that he would normally filter out before opening his mouth.
5. You dated in the past and his alcohol-induced emotional dam breaking just reminded him that being with you was cool. He suddenly misses your company in a nostalgic way and decides that the middle of the night is the perfect time to tell you how awesome you were together and that he’s sorry he screwed it up. Listen to however much of it you want, but know that it doesn’t change things. You still won’t work because whatever created the problem will still be there when he’s sober. Take a moment to appreciate your awesomeness that drunk exes seem to want to confess to you, and move on.
6. He absolutely hates you and wants to abuse you when he’s drunk. This guy will call you with nothing but insults and accusations just because he wants to take out his anger on someone. Don’t be that someone. Hear that first moment, and then refuse to answer any more calls or read any more texts. There is no reason for you to listen to the crap that he will spew because most of it isn’t even about you. It’s about his own frustrations that he’s channeling at you.
The next time you’re awoken at two in the morning by a weird phone call, it’s totally up to you to decided whether or not to answer it. If you do, these answers should help you figure out exactly what that early morning call actually means to you. At least it will help keep you from stumbling around in the dark wondering if you suddenly have a future with a guy that you didn’t see before.
Just remember that talking to him is totally up to you. You can have a memorable conversation with him, hear two words and hang up, or completely ignore his calls. It’s your prerogative.