With the seemingly billions of dating apps and social media meeting places out there now, a simple act in person can throw a girl for some serious loops. We just aren’t prepared for that face-to-face interaction anymore!
When it happens, we don’t know what to think about his reasons behind the gesture. Is it all about sex? Is he wanting to date you? Is he just being nice? What causes the unpopular action? Since there is so much guesswork involved now, I did what any girl would do and went digging for answers. That’s right, research! I asked a bunch of guys what they expected from a girl when they bought her a drink. Here are their answers:
1. He’s a friend and thinks you can’t afford a drink. If you can’t and you know that he knows it, then don’t look any farther into it and accept the drink(s). If you can afford your own stuff and don’t want to rob him of all his money, accept it and then tell him that you came into some money, or got paid that week. If you shoot his down, it may hurt his feelings. Even after knowing you can afford it, he may still just want to buy your drinks to be nice.
2. He wants to be nice and do something for you because he’s having fun and wants you to have a blast too. This is just a friendly gesture. He’s not expecting anything and you’ll know because he’ll give you the drink and start a conversation with someone else, or walk to the dart board. Everything about him will be screaming that it is no big deal. It might even come with a joke that he’s trying to perk you up a bit and make you more fun.
3. He is letting you know he’s a little interested and would like to have a conversation with you. This guy doesn’t just send you a drink across the bar. He hand-delivers it to you and lingers for a moment before saying something to open a conversation. This guy is normally expecting at least an attempt at a conversation.
4. He’s saluting you for whatever reason. Maybe you defeated him at darts, made him fall of his stool laughing, or maybe he thinks you’re gorgeous and just wanted to let you know. He’s not expecting anything but a “thanks.” This guy normally announces his intentions loudly with everyone knowing that he’s about to buy you a drink because you deserve one or send it across the bar with a slight nod in your direction when you get it. He’s just hoping you’ll keep doing whatever you’re doing.
5. He’s hoping you’ll go home with him. Hello, Mr. Sleazy. This guy will immediately think that he is entitled to a conversation, being able to touch you while he talks, and your complete attention. He is expecting you to fall to your knees at his feet thanking him for his generosity. You can normally recognize this guy immediately so just let your gut do the talking. If it says “run!” then go ahead and turn down that drink before you have to beat him off with a stick.
6. You’re already together and he’s being chivalrous. He thinks that he should buy you everything and, unless you have a problem with that, let him. It makes him feel all manly and proud of himself. If his ego is firmly intact, he’ll be completely pleasant all night.
When you get a drink from a guy at a bar, now you’ll have a better idea of his reasoning behind it. Most guys don’t expect anything from you for the drink, but some would enjoy a conversation with you. And there’s always a Mr. Sleazy around somewhere. What’s important is that you know what you want from the buyer of your drink. If you’re interested, the waltz on over and say thanks.
If you’re not, then send him packing nicely. No matter what his reasons are, you are in no way indebted to him for his purchase. You didn’t ask for it and you owe him nothing. Women have a real habit of feeling obligated to act a certain way after a man does something for us and that’s just silly. This is 2017 ladies.
Men are free to buy drinks for women if they want without being forced to marry them and women are not sold for the cost of one beer into marriage anymore. Feel confident and hang out with him only if you want to. If you don’t, politely tell him to move along. If you need to be less polite, then go for it; whatever it takes to get your point across that you are not interested in his company.