Home Love & Relationship What Does It Mean When A Guy Pats You On The Shoulder?

What Does It Mean When A Guy Pats You On The Shoulder?


Men. We can’t live with them, but we can’t live without them. Or so the saying goes, right? Sometimes they leave us wondering what the heck is going through their minds when they do certain things. Like when they ruffle our hair, give us a pat on the back or even when they pat you on your shoulder. The latter is probably why you are here today reading this article. You are looking for answers to why a guy would pat you on your shoulder. We don’t blame you for looking it up, because it can be utterly confusing. What does it even mean? Is it good? Is it bad? We understand why you wouldn’t know. This isn’t exactly the most common gesture a guy makes towards you. It can keep you wondering and wondering. What could possibly be the reasoning behind such an odd motion? Sure, your mom or your brother might do this type of thing to you. But a guy? Possibly a guy that you even like at that!

Now you’re wondering whether or not this type of thing means that  he likes you or not. Well, try not to get yourself too riled up, because we can certainly help you get to the bottom of this whole thing. So put your mind at ease!

He Is Encouraging You About Something

One of the main reasons that someone might pat you on your shoulders is because they are trying to show you some encouragement. At the time were you trying to move forward with something nerve-wracking? If so, this may be just why he was patting you on the shoulder. It was his way of telling you, “Hey, you got this! I believe in you! Go ahead.”

This does not mean that he likes you as more than a friend by any means. This is definitely something friends do to each other without being romantically involved.

He’s Trying To Flirt With You

Although the first reason may not imply any romantic feelings, this one just might! There might be a time that a man will pat you or rub you on your shoulder because he is trying to be flirtatious with you. But how are you supposed to know if this is the exact reason? Easy! Just pay attention to the signs and what the two of you were doing when he made this gesture. If nothing special was going on, but the two of you were flirting and he goes ahead and does this then there is a pretty good chance he was simply doing it because he was being flirty. You will need to figure out whether or not there are other signs that he was flirting with you. However, if there were then this is probably why he was doing it.

He Is Proud Of Something You Did

Then again it could be totally platonic. That is if he hasn’t made any other flirty moves. You can’t assume it was a flirtatious gesture without other flirty moves being made. Did you just do something awesome and you need to be congratulated? Did you win a prize or get approved for something? If so that might be why he was patting you or rubbing you on your shoulders. This is a gesture often used to say, “Hey, good job! I’m so proud of you for accomplishing this!”

This is definitely a friendly gesture and with this meaning has no romantic intention behind it whatsoever.

He Just Wants To Initiate Contact

This is a less common reason, but he could be patting your shoulders or even going as far as to squeeze or rub them because he simply is looking for a way to initiate contact between you. This would generally mean that he has feelings for you and likes you as more than just a friend. He might be too nervous to make any sort of move on you. Such as a kiss or a hug and instead he might think this is the most innocent way to make a move. It’s subtle, but it’s definitely something that tells you he has feelings for you. You might notice that he will get a little nervous in doing so, but you will also notice there is no other reasoning for him to be doing this.

He Thinks You’re Stressed

Sometimes when we are stressed out we just need some sort of reassurance. This reassurance can come from a hug, a pat on the back or a shoulder pat/squeeze/rub. He might be doing this because he thinks that you are very stressed out and need some sort of reassurance! He might think that a hug is a little too invasive. Being touched can calm us down in times where we feel ultimately stressed out. So therefore it might be what led him to make this gesture towards you.


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