The Difference Between Emotional Attachment and Physical Attachment
You might think that you know everything and have this whole ordeal figured out by now. But you might also still find yourself questioning whether what you are thinking is true or not. That is completely understandable. Relationships are more complex than we like to think they are. Picking them apart is hard and figuring out where you stand with someone is even more difficult. So how can you tell where you are in your relationship with a man? What is the different types of attachment you should be knowledgeable of?
There are three types of attachment when it comes to a man.
There is first the ‘friend attachment’, which is usually the first type of attachment when you start building any type of relationship with him. This means that he cares about you deeply, but only in a platonic way. Which essentially says he just wants to remain friends with you. The unfortunate truth is that sometimes you get stuck in this attachment with someone. How can you tell if this is the level that you are on? There are a few things that will give it away.
Such as you won’t be doing anything romantic with each other, that’s for sure. Your hangouts will mainly be around other people. Your communication with each other will be fairly minimal. There may be a few texts here and there, but nothing truly substantial. You will also find that there is no jealousy between the two of you when it comes to seeing other people or flirting with them.
Secondly comes the ‘physical attachment’, which is the attachment that comes after the friendship stage. You two have discovered that you find one another attractive and you act on it. This generally means you get intimate with each other or, at the very least, flirt excessively. You don’t have to go all the way for you to reach this stage. This can definitely mean that you have only held hands, kissed or flirted in different ways together. But you will find that there isn’t any other depth to it than physical contact with each other.
Lastly we have ‘emotional attachment’ which is the final stage of attachment where the two of you are bordering on being in a real relationship together. Of course, you don’t have to identify as being in a relationship for this stage to be true. Read below to find out what makes up the emotional attachment stage!
How To Know If He’s Already Emotionally Invested Or Not:
- He isn’t interested in anyone else but you:
You can definitely tell when a man is becoming emotionally attached to you by the way he puts himself out into the dating pool. Which in this case, would be not at all! You won’t find someone who truly has feelings for you going out and dating other people. Instead you will find him solely focusing all of his romantic attention on you, as well as his intimate ones.
- He’s always keeping in contact with you:
Becoming invested in someone also means that he will spend most of his time trying to talk with you. You may notice an influx in the frequency of your conversations and text messages. You will be talking much longer than you were talking before and definitely touching on more personal subjects than previously. He will always be popping up in your inbox and most likely be communicating with you from the very start of your days.
- He remembers the important things:
Let’s face it: Men aren’t the best at remember things, usually. However, if he has started to develop a strong emotional bond with you, he will certainly try to remember all of the important details that you have told him. This is his way of trying to score brownie points, because he is considering dating you.
- He wants to make you happy:
There’s no doubt that a man who isn’t emotionally attached won’t go out of his way to put a smile on your face daily. However, if he is emotionally digging you, he will make an effort to make you happy whenever he can. This can come in small forms or grand gestures!
- He goes out of his way to help you:
And just as he is trying to make you happier, he will also go out of his way to be there for you when you need somebody. Say your car breaks down and you ask him to give you a lift. He’ll gladly do it and he’ll do it quickly to try to impress you.
- He lets his guard down:
Unlike someone is physically attached to you, someone who is emotionally invested will let themselves open up to you. They will try to connect with you on a much deeper level. They will also be accepting if you do the same thing with them.
- He tries to find common ground:
Being physical with someone and actually getting to know them personally are two very, very different things. So you can be sure he’s gearing more towards the emotional attachment if he is making the extra effort to find common interests the two of you can share together.
- He’s got your back at all times:
He might be harboring some deeper feelings for you if he stands up for you when a situation calls for it. He will also be there by your side when you are going through a tough time or need someone to rely on. This is not something that just anyone does. He will definitely feel extremely connected to you if he is doing these types of things for you consistently.
- You can spend a lot of time together, alone:
He will definitely not want to share you with anyone else if he is emotionally attached to you. You will notice your group hang out sessions become more and more fickle over time. You will start to see him pushing for time alone with you. And not just to do the dirty deed. You two will do many other things besides that! If you are only getting together to get physical with each other, then you are probably still stuck in the ‘physical attachment’ stage.
Things That Makes Him Emotionally Attached:
- Communicating With Him:
What makes him want to get emotionally attached to you is the way that you communicate with him. Being open, honest and consistent with your conversations is key to getting him to want to invest in a relationship with you. You can’t blow him off whenever you want. He is going to want to know that you are something stable in his life.
- Being His Support:
Supporting him is another key factor in getting him attached to you on a deeper level. You cannot build any type of relationship with anyone without being supportive of them in every way that you possibly can. Being there for him when he needs you is crucial in making him see you as more than just a friend or peer in his life.
- Showing Him Your Vulnerable Side:
What’s one of the most important things when it comes to getting emotional with someone? Vulnerability. Or, as we said before, letting your guard down. This is going to be what helps set you apart from other women in his life. He will see that you are totally comfortable around him. Enough so to show him parts of you that you don’t tend to show just anyone. Let him take a peek inside your mind. It will only make him more invested in you in the long run.
- Letting Him Show You His Vulnerable Side:
Just like you want to show him that you can be vulnerable around him, you are going to want to encourage him that it’s okay for him to let his guard down around you as well. He might be hesitant at first, but what he is going to appreciate is the encouragement you give him to do so. This will show him that you are not afraid of being personal with him.
- Being Cautious Of How You Fight:
Everybody who is in a relationship, whether serious or not, ends up fighting at some point. These can range from tiny spats to huge blowouts. We are suggesting that if you want to make him emotionally attached to the max that you be weary of how you fight with him. Fighting too big, too soon can make him lose interest in pursuing the relationship altogether.
- Showing Your Appreciation:
Showing him that you appreciate him for who he is or what he does for you is going to be the topping of the cake for him. He’s going to see that you are really girlfriend material and it will only make him fall for you deeper.
- Keeping Things Interesting:
You might not have been an item for very long, but it’s important to not let things get boring extremely fast. You want to ensure that things are kept interesting. Even from the very beginning.
- Being Serious About Him:
One thing that will really make him want to get even more emotionally attached to you is if you get super serious about your relationship with him. That means almost making a commitment to him and not wasting your time (or his) by seeing other people while the two of you are seeing each other.
- Getting Intimate With Him Physically and Emotionally:
It’s easy to get physical with someone, but bridging the gap between emotional intimacy and physical intimacy is an entire different story. It’s up to you to make that happen. Without bringing them both together, he will not want to fully, 100% fully let himself get emotionally attached to you.