If you are asking, “Why do ex-girlfriends always come back?”, then you must be dealing with an ex-girlfriend who has returned. Either that, or you have watched your friends get back together with an ex-girlfriend over and over again. While relationships can sometimes survive a break up, it is less likely that the relationship will remain strong. There are always going to be hurt feelings and pain because of the break up. In addition, many of the problems that led to the break up will still remain. Now, you want to know why she keeps coming back and what it really means.
There are a number of reasons why ex-girlfriends always seem to come back. The question really isn’t why they return, but if you want to have a relationship again. Presumably, you ended things for a reason. It might hurt to go through a break up, but getting back together might just delay an inevitable break up later on. Is that what you want to do? Unless you are fairly sure that you can fix the problems in your relationship, there is no reason to get back together.
1. An Emotional Connection
Even if you just had a sexual fling, feelings will start to develop. If you were actually dating each other, then there were definitely feelings that developed between you. Even if she was the one who initiated the break up, those feelings will still remain. Once she realizes the enormity of what she has done, she starts to think about all the good things in the relationship. She still has feelings for you and cannot let go of that emotional connection.
2. She Regrets the Break Up
This is an obvious reason why ex-girlfriends always seem to come back. For some reason, she regrets the break up. She has had time to think about it, and she realizes what a horrible mistake it was. She may have broken up with you for a logical reason like needing to focus on school or not being the right fit for you. Despite all of those reasons, she still loves you and regrets breaking up with you.
3. She Is Lonely
Some people always seem to be in relationships. As soon as one relationship ends, they jump into another one. They just cannot handle being alone with their thoughts and feelings. If a new relationship does not appear right away, then they try to cling to the old one so that they do not have to face life alone.
4. You Started Dating Someone
This is an unfortunate, but possible, reason why she might keep coming back. It is one thing to be through with a relationship. She doesn’t want you or need you anymore, so she is ready to move on. While she expected to live an exciting single life and date charming guys, no one has appeared yet. Worse still, she saw your Facebook photos from the bar. The darling, gorgeous woman on your arm infuriates your ex-girlfriend. Even if she understands that it is jealousy, she can’t help feeling envious. You were once her boyfriend, and she cannot imagine you being with someone else. She may not realize she is doing it, but she is trying to get back together with you because she just cannot handle the idea of you being with someone else.
5. You Were Her First Serious Relationship
If you have dated a few girlfriends and had a serious relationship, then you know what to expect. You know what works with your personality and which personality traits will be a problem. When the relationship ends, you know that it is time to move on. You have gone through a break up before, so you know how to control your feelings, stay busy and work on healing.
When someone has never had a serious relationship before, they have no clue how to handle a break up. All of the feelings are overwhelming. If you were her first serious boyfriend, then she may have imagined a future together. She might not have really planned it all out, but she just assumed that you would be together forever. Now, she has to completely rethink all of her future without you. The crushing despair and heartbreak of a break up can be unbearable if you have never tried to handle these feelings before. She might be desperately trying to get back together with you because she just doesn’t understand the feelings she is going through and is unwilling to re-imagine her life without you.
Now, the real question isn’t why ex-girlfriends always seem to come back. The real question is what you are going to do about it. Do you really want to have her back? You broke up for a reason, and that reason still exists. Unless you really think that things will be different, it is probably best to just move on.