Home Love & Relationship Why Is He Suddenly Being Mean To You?

Why Is He Suddenly Being Mean To You?


So everything was going great… You met a guy and he seems perfect. The two of you are vibing, texts are flowing smoothly and he’s out to make you smile! But suddenly there is a shift in tone. Texts are rocky, there is no longer any vibe and he’s the farthest from wanting to see you happy that he possibly could be.  why is my crush being mean to me all of a sudden

And all you can think is

What the heck happened here?

Now he’s being mean to you and you don’t even know what to do.

Besides curl up and cry, of course.

Yes, this happens all of the time. To many people. So first, we want to tell you not to feel alone. This happens more often than you would think.

But we are sure that you want to know why?

We would if we were you.

Which is why we are writing this right now. To help you understand all of the reasons why he might suddenly be being mean to you.

Just keep on scrolling if you want to know what these reasons are!

Why He Turned Mean

Whether with a boyfriend or a simple crush, sometimes men turn mean. And for seemingly no reason.

We hate to be the ones to tell you this, but there is always a reason.

Here they are:

  • He’s Just Joking:

Why Do Guys Seem Mean To Girls For No Reason

You might have made the mistake of taking what he says too seriously! Sometimes our boyfriends can be mean just to get us riled up. They think it’s kind of funny! Even if we don’t. It could be that he was just joking around with you or has started making a habit of joking with you just to see you get a little upset. Obviously if you have an issue with this behavior, you should tell him. Let him know that it bothers you that he does this kind of kidding with you and that you would appreciate it if he puts a stop to it. If he continues, it can put strain on whatever relationship that you two share.

Better to express how you feel about it now rather than later.

  • He Found Someone Else:

More commonly with our crushes that our boyfriends, you might find he turns a bit nasty towards you when he starts focusing on somebody else. This is because he is doing his best to push you away from him. He might think that being rude to you is the only way to get you to leave him alone. If he continues being nice to you, you might not get the idea that he doesn’t want you anymore. Yes, this sucks majorly, but it’s just something that people do. He wants to be with someone else, not you, and he’s not afraid to make you hate him over it.

  • He Wants To End Things:

Why Do Guys Seem Mean To Girls For No Reason

As we mentioned above, he might be simply trying to push you away from him. To do that, he wants to be mean to you. It is always easier to hate someone than it is to love them, right? Well, that’s what he is thinking anyways. He just doesn’t want to continue the relationship with you at this point and so he’s going to ruin the bond you have now.

  • He’s Just A Rude Person:

Maybe he never learned any manners. Or it could be that he doesn’t realize how rude he is really being to you. Some people just have jerk-type personalities. These are the type of people who come off as harsh, judgemental and have a tendency to lash out at people when they don’t get their way or they are in a bad mood. You can work on this, though. Not all hope is lost in this specific situation. He may just not be self aware. So it’s up to you if you want to sit him down and have a discussion about the way he acts. He might be immediately resentful, but if you can show him how his actions are negatively affecting you and those around him, you might be able to get him to stop acting out that way.

  • He’s Trying To Get A Rise:

You may have done something that upset him or you may have been a little mean to him first. If so, he might be trying to retaliate by mirroring your behavior. Were you rude to him first? Well, that might just be exactly why he is being rude to you now.

  • You’re Too Invasive:

Reasons Why Your Boyfriend's So Mean

There are times where people lash out because they feel ‘smothered’ or ‘suffocated’ by their partners or love interests. You may not be giving him enough space and it’s freaking him out. So in turn, he’s being a bit mean to try to get you to back off of him. Even if it’s just for the day! Try giving him some space and see if that solves your problem!


  1. Everyday i have to walk past the boss builders desk that sit right in view and when i walk past he says all she does is walk around lol now and its starting to make me feel awkward like yesterday he said it in such a tone it made me flinch he says it quite often

    • If your boss is being rude to you, then your work environment is no longer safe. If you are able to speak with him boss about his behaviors, then do so. If he owns the company or your company is not responsive to complaints about inappropriate behaviors, then determine what you want for your future. You can address your concerns to the government or find a new job. Have a great day, Clare!

  2. There is a guy I had a crush on. He got to know that I had a crush on him, but he was acting normal
    But after a few days he started making fun of me. He started teasing me like how he teases his bff. He kicks my leg to make me angry and does it till I hit him back
    Does it mean he is trying to make me hate him

    • He is flirting with you. He does not want you to not like him. He may be interested in developing a relationship with you. Make a decision about what you want for your future. Speak with him about your thoughts and feelings. Nourish this relationship by spending additional time with him in person. Have a great day, Sahithi!

  3. my boss is so nice to me at first and flirty and then all of sudden hes started being rude and putting his anger on me and then he is nice again .

    • His behaviors are inappropriate. It is possible that he is interested in developing a relationship. When you do not respond, he likely feels upset and chooses to behave improperly. Make a decision about what you believe is appropriate for your continued employment. You may want to speak with human resources about his behavior. Have a great day, Selena!

  4. I have a crush and he texted me normally and well we never spoke to eachother in the class i was too shy and later when i texted him again he was straight out rude like he was giving me attitude idk why all of a sudden is this change in his behaviour

    • He made the decision to be rude to you. This behaviors are unacceptable an inappropriate. He has show you that he is not the type of person that you want to maintain a romantic relationship with. Make a decision about what you want for your future without him, and focus your emotional energy elsewhere. Regardless of his behaviors, you will find great benefit in sharing your kindness and compassion at all times. Have a great day, Saher!

  5. I went to camp with my crush and were both friends. His friend tells me he likes me. But He quickly denies this claim. We talked a lot camp. All of the sudden in snapchat he just leaves me on open and never answers anything, doesn’t send streaks, and just told me to screw off and I just don’t get it.

    • Your crush’s friend told you that he liked you. He then followed up by telling you that he isn’t interested in speaking with you. Make a decision about what you want for the future of the relationship with your crush. Speak with him about your thoughts and feelings. Give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Nourish this relationship by spending additional time with him in person. Have a great day, Mia!

  6. Me and my crush don’t really talk but since we started a new grade he looks really upset and we don’t even talk and I keep having dreams about him being mad at me .

    • It seems that your relationship with your crush is strained. This means that you need to make a decision about what you want for the future of this relationship. There may be something that you need to address in regards to this relationship. Speak with him about your thoughts and feelings, and give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Have a great day, Ava!

    • Thank you for sharing your positive comment. Please share more of your thoughts and feelings in the future. Have a great day, Ava!

  7. Me and this guy at work became quick friends since he started a year ago but I always had a thing for him. Turns out he liked me too. We started texting. Texting turned into flirty messages but I stopped it because he is with someone long term. We agreed to stop and then a month later it started again, only a couple of messaged here and there but we both knew were it was leading. After a couple of days I stopped it again because I felt bad with him having a partner and whenever I saw him in person it was liked he struggled to communicate with me any way so I wasnt really sure how he felt. Ever since then I cant gage the situation. sometimes I feel like he hates me. We argue all the time in work- this has gradually got worse and worse. But I still like him and hate the way it is. Is there any going back as 1% of the time he acts ok with me but most of the time he just seems rude. When I’ve asked him if we are ok he response pretty bluntly that we are fine. I dont know what to do. I try to engage on a friendly level but he just seems distant. It’s like he is stopping himself being nice on purpose. But then am I just telling myself that because I cant admit he just doesnt like me anymore. I need help

    • The two of you are maintaining a social relationship. You were flirting and you made the correct decision to stop flirting. He is maintaining a relationship with someone else, so do not attempt to harm their relationship. The arguing at work may be related to your attraction to each other. He has chosen to not be nice to you, because he is unable to separate his social and romantic feelings. Allow thoughts of him to fade, and focus your emotional energy elsewhere. Have a great day, Kathleen!

  8. There’s this guy who was nice and chill sometimes a little eccentric but then I don’t know what happened but he suddenly just started being mean I’m not sure if it’s something I did he always likes to bother me he always flips my hair or kicks me until I answer him or kick back but now he’s just saying really mean things he was already like that but a lot less mean I’ve tried to ignore him but then he bothers my friend and I get jealous and I don’t know why.

    • It is likely that he felt that your relationship was no longer viable, and he decided to treat you inappropriately. It seems that your jealousy is an indication of your feelings toward him.

    • He might say he wants to be friends because he wants to actually be friends or he just wants to stay a part of your life. The fact that he is mean to you all the time and tells you things are your fault seems to indicate that he either doesn’t want to or isn’t capable of being friends. There is no rule that says you have to be friends with your ex. Considering how mean he is, I’d move on and let him heal alone.

  9. I have a crush on my bestfriend and he knows about it. But he never made it weird and we even dated once. We’re really close and have spent the past week staying up all night on the phone. Last night, we fell asleep on the phone together and wheb I woke up this morning he’s being distant and kinda rude. He said he’s not mad but only gives me one word reply and doesn’t message me at all. I don’t know if i’m overthinking or something or if he’s actually mad at me.

    • He may just be tired. It seems unlikely that a guy could go from your best friend and falling asleep on the phone with you one night and hate you the next. Since he knows you like him and dated you once, perhaps he is starting to like you again. If he is upset, it may just be because he is super tired today or he is annoyed at himself for developing feelings again. Wait and see what happens! Good luck!


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