Home Love & Relationship Will He Ever Contact Me Again?

Will He Ever Contact Me Again?

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When you break up with someone, it is traumatic. Even if you did the breaking up, you still feel uncertain. Did you make the right decision? Should you try to get back together with him? If he broke up with you, this process is even more stressful. You know that he wanted to end things, but you do not know if he will change his mind. He has completely stopped contacting you, and you need to figure out what to do.

Before we can discuss if he will contact you again, we need to make a few things clear. Put down your phone or tablet. If you were thinking of emailing him, texting him or calling him, think again. If you are at the point where you think that he will never talk to you again, it is safe to say that you should not reach out to him. You already know that he doesn’t want to talk. If you reach out to him, he will see it as annoying, clingy, crazy, needy or all of the above.

We are not saying that you should do the No Contact Rule. People mistakenly believe that the No Contact Rule means that they can’t talk to the person ever. This is wrong. If your ex-boyfriend reaches out, says he wants to get back together and wants to meet up, go for it. We have heard far too many stories of an ex asking to get back together and the girl missing her chance because she was doing the No Contact Rule. If he wants to get together again and you think it will work, do it.

At the same time, there is a time and a place for the No Contact Rule. Your goal right now is to start talking to him again without seeming weird or clingy. If you start texting him 20 times a day, you will never get a chance to be with him again. If you know that he does not want to talk now, start the No Contact Rule. No matter how much it hurts, wait at least a week (and maybe a month) before you reach out to him. If he reaches out to you in the interim, that’s different.

Looking at Your Situation

Before you can actually figure out if he will get in touch with you again, you have to look at your situation. If you sent him packing, his ego might be too bruised to get in touch with you again. Likewise, a guy who is offended, upset or enraged is probably not going to want to get in contact with you. Look at everything that happened before the sudden lack of contact. If you think that you are mostly or entirely at fault, then he is probably not going to reach out. If he is especially forgiving, he might reach out to you in a few weeks, but you will need to wait for him to make that move.

In other situations, the chances of him contacting you might increase or decrease. If he broke up with you, then he might rethink his decision. You just have to stay calm and wait things out. If you try to push him into dating you or talking to you again, it could end up pushing him away for good. Instead of doing this, you need to wait and see what happens. You cannot force someone to talk to you, so you have to wait until he realizes that contacting you is the right thing to do.

We also get asked this question by ladies who just went on their first or second date. After the first date, it is easy to become paranoid that he won’t reach out. Each hour ticks by painfully as you debate whether you should call him or not. In this scenario, your decision is entirely up to you. If you think that the date went well and you want to go out again, call him up or text him. See if he is available on the next weekend. If he says no, then hold off and let him make the next move. If he was honestly just busy, then he will end up calling you. If you are nervous about calling him first, then just wait a few days to see what happens. People get busy and life gets in the way. He probably doesn’t want to seem too eager, so his call may come a couple of days after your date.



It All Depends on You

Most of the time, we get this question from people who just went through a break up. Whether he contacts you again or not depends entirely on how you acted. If you were on your knees and begging for a second chance, he might never talk to you again. If you were calm and collected during the break up, then he might reach out to you again once he realizes his mistake.

All of this assumes, of course, that you two are meant to be together. As hard as it is to accept, there are cases where you love someone, but they are not the right person for you. It is easy to fall in love, and it is hard to forget someone. Even when your brain knows that he was not truly right for you, your heart will not accept it.

In these cases, it just takes time. You will heal, but you have to give your heart a chance to get over the past. If you are truly a good couple together, then some time apart will make him realize just how important you are to his life. During this time, all you can do is be patient and hope that everything works out for the best. While you wait, focus on yourself. Spend time with your friends and stay busy so that each moment passes by faster. Before long, you will realize that you never needed him anyway—and if he reaches out, you will be able to make a rational decision about getting back together or not.

66 COMMENTS

  1. hello, I really need help.
    I and my boyfriend argued and I called him selfish…he was angry, and he said “just don’t talk to me anymore, don’t claim me, I’m not yours and your not mine. just remember you ended it not me”. Then he deleted his Instagram and Twitter accounts, that’s the only things we contact, but his parents are so strict so right now he doesn’t have a phone, I don’t know how to contact. The next day, I talked to him and said that I don’t want to break up, then he cried… but he still ignores me until now. Today I hugged him, he hugged me back but just like a touch, then he put his hands into his hoodie, I still hugged him, then he hugged me again and tightly…what should I do? Is he really going to break up with me?… 🙁

    • He has blocked you, but he has also given you a hug. It is likely that he is confused or uncertain about his feelings toward you. Take this time to determine what you want for the future of this relationship. Speak directly and honestly with him about your thoughts and feelings. Give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Have a great day, Tr!

  2. hello, I really need help.
    I and my boyfriend argued and I called him selfish…he was angry, and he said “just don’t talk to me anymore, don’t claim me, I’m not yours and your not mine. just remember you ended it not me”. Then he deleted his Instagram and Twitter accounts, that’s the only things we contact, but his parents are so strict so right now he doesn’t have a phone, I don’t know how to contact. The next day, I talked to him and said that I don’t want to break up, then he cried… but he still ignores me until now. Today I hugged him, he hugged me back but just like a touch, then he put his hands into his hoodie, I still hugged him, then he hugged me again and tightly…what should I do? Is he really going to break up with me?… 🙁

    • He has blocked you, but he has also given you a hug. It is likely that he is confused or uncertain about his feelings toward you. Take this time to determine what you want for the future of this relationship. Speak directly and honestly with him about your thoughts and feelings. Give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Have a great day, Ng!

  3. It’s been a long time for me. I wrote and spoke to him, sent him lots of messages. All the things you’re not supposed to do. He would NEVER speak to me again. I ran into him about 8 months ago after 5 years. He could barely look at me and did not reply when I said hello.
    I never did anything to hurt him. He broke up with me. We were together for a few years and friends before that.
    Worst break up ever. I often wish I never met him. He hurt my feelings. My life got messed my life up so much. I can’t believe I went through such a bad experience over loving someone.

    • Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings. It is clear that he is embarrassed about his actions. He may be unable or unwilling to speak with you about his actions. Focus your emotional energy elsewhere. Spend additional time with your friends and family. Allow the memory of this relationship to influence you to treat everyone in your life with kindness and compassion. Have a great day, Freida!

  4. I met this guy on tinder nd we talked bt i noticed he was kind of a cold person!we talked nd i liked him bt am nt sure he likes me or he is pretending!he doesnt cal me,most times wen i cal im,he always find one excuse or d oda nt to talk to me!he doesnt always want to hear dat i went out-.he wil start .questionin me ifi went to see a guy or not!d day i got angry wit im nd told im he is selfish,den he started beggin me nd singin fr me,am nt sure he likes or not,what do u tijnk

    • He is uncertain or confused or uncertain about his feelings toward you. The two of you are not in a relationship, so he should not attempt to prevent you from nourishing a relationship with someone else. If he reaches out to you again, then determine what you want for your relationship at that time. Speak directly and honestly with him about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, Leemah!

  5. Hello I really need some advice recently my boyfriend broke up with me and I was heart broken I ask him to give me a another chance but he said he can’t I’m sorry but after he said I can still talk to him and text etc and be friends but I can’t accept that and I have texted him saying I can’t be his friend at this moment because of my feelings and I’ll be his friend and text him when I’m ready it’s been a week since the break up and I’ve been trying to be strong and not text him but I want to so bad but I’m not sure if it’s the right thing to do and I’m afraid of the outcome if I do contact him and text him

    • He has shared his thoughts and feelings with you. He is unable or unwilling to continue to nourish this relationship. Allow your emotional energy to focus elsewhere. Allow thoughts of him to fade. Take this time to determine what you want for your future without him. If he reaches out to you in the future, then speak directly and honestly with him about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, Emily!

    • Hi Emily,

      I’m in a similar situation and I just wondered how things panned out for you since you wrote this? Did he ever contact you. It’s the worst feeling in the world breaking up with someone isn’t it. X

      • Thank you for sharing your supportive comment. It is always beneficial when our readers share their insights and experiences. Have a great day, Jess!

  6. My boyfriend broke up with me 2 weeks ago because we would argue for small things and he would say that I wasn’t affectionate enough I honestly didn’t think I was like that I would try to show him love once in a while, he told me that he wanted to get back with me later on. Will he reach out to me or should I?

    • He has shared his thoughts and feelings with you. He is unwilling or unable to continue to maintain a relationship with you. There is no reason to reach out to him at this time. Take this time to determine what you want for your future without him. If he reaches out to you in the future, then speak directly and honestly with him about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, Daisy!

  7. I was in a long distance relationship for four years, during the last five months we argued about him coming to America, he was tired if being alone and so was I. He was supposed to move here with me but his argument was not having enough money to purchase a home however, I was ready to start our lives together. Our communication was here and there due to my list of wifi.. before we video chat every day and had physically been together maybe a total of 5mo. As he visited me 4xs and I him only 1x. We last saw each other in person July 31st, shortly after my visit I lost my wifi then with limited access to the wifi he and I started to argue became somewhat distant and got upset with each other then ended our relationship in December. I was hurt but I can’t help but wonder if he’ll reach out to me cause at one point we considered ourselves soul mate…will he call or should I move on? He is also in a new relationship which I believe is a rebound. However our last text conversation about a week ago ended let’s say without argument but no conclusion…what should I do?

    • He has shared his thoughts and feelings with you. He has ended your relationship. He has establishing a new relationship. He is unable or unwilling to nourish a relationship with you at this time. Focus your emotional energy elsewhere. Take this time to determine what you want for your future without him. Have a great day, Diane!

  8. I have a big problem and little to no hope. Me and my long term girlfriend broke up recently. She made some big mistakes and didn’t want to own up for them. Then when I pushed to get back together her excuse was (I don’t want to hurt you again) but I still pushed. Eventually she blocked me fully. I waited a couple of days and then she was very spiteful and telling me to move on and she didn’t want me in her life anymore. I sent letters and text and she threatened with a restating order if I don’t leave her alone. So I stoped fully. But I never truly got answers and I can’t talk to her at all now. Is there any hope? I will give allot more details if you can give me solid advice!

    • She has shared her thoughts and feelings. She has blocked you. She has explained that she will get a restraining order if you continue to contact her. She does not want you to contact her. There is no hope in this relationship. Allow thoughts of her to fade. Learn from this relationship. This will ensure that you are more respectful and compassionate in your future relationships. Have a great day, Gilbert!

  9. I caught my BF of 4 months on a dating site he originally met me on. He has only been on it 2 days but I finished with him by text telling him I’d seen him on it. Since then I went NC, 8 weeks now and I’ve heard nothing apart from he has been recently checking my status on another messenger platform. I miss him so much, is there any hope?

    • He has attempted to develop a relationship with someone else while the two of you are in a relationship. There is no reason to attempt to nourish a relationship with him. Allow your emotional energy to change focus. Take this time to determine what you want for your future without him. Have a great day, Mel!

  10. I met this guy online and we talked for a whole month before meeting. We would talk every day, facetime and phone calls. We went on a date and it was very successful, he was into me and also he asked me out for a second date. However, he had a trip to his country for a whole month while we were dating and we never had a chance for the second date (Although he already had the date planned.) He asked me to stay in contact with him during his trip, so did I, but while he was there he only contacted me once. Once he was back, he saw my last messages (1 Month Later) and left me on seen (Although he asked me to stay available when he came back). It has been 3 month since then and he’s very alive (nothing bad going on with him, I know because I saw a video of him online.) I miss talking to him. What should I do, wait for him to contact me (if he ever does)? Move On? or try to contact him and ask him why did it happen? (this question doesn’t get out of my head no matter how hard I try. Help.

    • He has stopped talking with you. He is not maintaining a relationship with you. There is no reason for you to continue to focus your emotional energy on him. He is not focusing his emotional energy on you. Take this time to determine what you want for your future. If he reaches out to you in the future, speak directly and honestly with him about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, May!

  11. My ex broke up with me over Christmas time I tried everything to apologise for the argument we had. I bought him a bunny for Christmas, sent flowers and a card to his house, wrote letters, sent emails. I tried everything, he read the letter and blocked me. This is after two years together. There is nothing left I can do. I feel like such an idiot for trying too hard. But all it did was push him away. I am worried he will never talk to me ever again 🙁 does anyone have any advice?

    • He has blocked you. He is not interested in maintaining a relationship with you. Focus your emotional energy elsewhere. Take this time to determine what you want for your future without him. If he reaches out to your in the future, then speak directly and honestly with him at that time. Treat everyone in your life with kindness and compassion. Have a great day, Jenny!

  12. My boyfriend left me a week ago. We been together for 4 yrs we were inseparable. Just recently he went through a rough patch that was draining The both of us. We argued a lot about it & I tried being there emotionally for him, because there was nothing I could physically do for him (money issues). that’s when he left me. He told me He thought long and hard about it & that he no longer loves me like he use to. He told me he has a lot of ambition to succeed into the real world & that he needed to find himself, and that it was more important then me. he told me he didn’t have time to be in a relationship right now. He said it wasn’t me, he said it was him. Letting me go was just one less thing to worry about. I cried a lot to him and tried to persuade him to stay but his answer was always no. He told me I was beautiful and that I was pure and still have a lot ahead of me. He even cried with me. After trying my best to persuade him, I eventually agreed with him and told him I respect his decisions. We work together, I am his employee and he is my employer. We actually work at a place we both built together with his knowledge & my labor. He said next time I contact him, it should only be about work. He’s giving me a month until I find something new. A few days after the break up I tried texting him how he was doing. He gave me a negative response and told me that I didn’t need to know. He told me he deleted all our pictures together & that broked my heart. It took a really long time to let that sink in that maybe he doesn’t want anything with me anymore. Later that night I packed everything he ever gave me and I gave it back to him. I told him it were things I couldn’t Bare to look at and throw away & if he wanted to throw it away he can. I wanted to show him that I can be strong too. We gave each other a very long hug and he cried in each others arms. He kissed my forehead and he held my hand very tightly and told me to become the best version of myself. He told me that if he ever came back to me, I shouldn’t accept him back and that if I became the best version of myself that I shouldn’t go back to him. This was coming from someone who told me he wanted to marry me. We were each others first love and we met each others parents. His parents love me and my parents adore him.
    I know it’s only been a week of break up and we only contact eachother 3x the whole week and only for work. It’s hard to do the no contact rule when we both work at the same place. I manage everything and he only goes in on the Days I’m not there now.
    I know I wasn’t the best either but I’m working on rebuilding myself. I know exactly what he is going thru his stress and depression & finance problems even so I think about him and I worry about him everyday even though we are no longer together. I dream about him every night too. While I’m working on myself, will he ever come back to me? And why was he crying and latching on to me when he was the one who left me? If I rebuilt myself and don’t let the past define us, will he accept me again?

    • The two of you have decided to end this relationship. Allow thoughts of him to fade. Focus your emotional energy elsewhere. Take this time to determine what you want for your future without him. If he reaches out to you in the future, then share your kindness and compassion with him. Treat everyone in your life with kindness and compassion, as this will ensure that positive people and energy will enter into your life. Have a great day, Faraway!

  13. My ex broke up with me about 2.5 weeks ago. He is 9 yrs younger than me (he’s only 21!) and he said he felt he can’t give me the more serious relationship he feels I need. We dated about 6 months, I was his first labeled gf. I’m at a loss, I really don’t know how to go about mending this relationship bc he seems so set in his mind. I truly fell for him over the time we shared, and I would do almost anything to have another chance with him. I haven’t seen any articles with a major age gap coming between a couple and I’m at a loss. Since the breakup there has been no contact, except we work together and he’s very cold and avoids me when we see each other. I feel like I meant nothing to him! But he watches my Snapchat stories every time I post one. Is there any hope in this instance or is it completely over bc he feels I need too much? The breakup conversation was very civil and kind. He said he’s not over me but he felt like he cannot conduct a deeper rship and he can’t ask me to wait.

    • He has shared his thoughts and feelings with you. There may be a reason for why his feelings have changed. Regardless, he is unable or unwilling to nourish a long term romantic relationship with you. Determine what you want for your future. Speak directly and honestly with him about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, Rowan!

  14. This guy and I have been in a sexual relationship off and on for 5 years. I am Still yet to be called his girlfriend…but I am in love with him..I have done everything for him and have tried everything possible..he only calls or texts on his time.. he goes without speaking to me sometimes for several weeks and up to a month..my texts to him are ignored..he is with other women and I have found out..still tells me that we will be together and that he loves me..I don’t know how much more of this hurt I can take. He does everything for every other girl but the one who has stood by him for all these years me is treated so horribly..is there anything else I should be doing that I have not done already??? I have walked away a few times but then he comes running back to me..most of his exes have never stuck by him as long as I have. I hate being in this much pain wondering when I will hear from him again. when he will ever just want me and not other women..when he will just grow up hes 33 now. The games should just stop

    • He has chosen that he is willing to nourish relationships with other women while you are with him. He may be in a serious relationship. Determine what you want for your future. Decide what you believe is appropriate and acceptable for your relationship. Speak directly and honestly with him about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, Jenny!

  15. Hi,
    I had a 1 year relationship with a guy. He would act so emotional and loving but would always say I just like u a lot, its not love. So i never said anything coz he had big idea about “love” i thought.
    Then a week ago he was as usual very emotional n loving and asking pictures and talking to me on the phone. Next day he confesses he met this new girl a month ago n he is in “love” with her! Also said when he messaged me he was actaually missing her. I dont understand if he was missing her than why not message her. Also i dont think he was missing her coz why would he want to hear my voice n see my pitcures if he was pretending? Anyways I broke up coz I could bear the fact that he used the word ” love” when he was so afraid to use it with me.
    He did tell me few times he loved me but when we were arguing he denied ever using that word ! I really dont undesertand how he could be with me just” liking” me claiming he cant fall in love and then suddenly he meets this girl n is ready to use that word? He says she is not pretty n also bit fat ! I just don’t understand this stupid guy!

    • It is possible that he did not use the word because he did not want to lie to you. You will find benefit in now abusing other people in your life by calling them names. He is no longer interested in developing a relationship with you. Allow your thoughts of him to fade. Determine what you want for your future without him. Have a great day, Emily!

  16. My ex boyfriend asked for a break about 2 months ago but a week later he said he regrets it and wants to get back together. But I asked for time and three weeks later I broke up with him and asked to stay friends because I believe he really need a break to talk to his friends and get his life back together since he needs to focus on school and sports. The next two weeks he was really heart broken and didn’t come to school properly but I felt super miserable seeing him upset and I checked on him once in a while. One time I sent a text taking about how awful I felt seeing him like this and I told him I still loved him. But he said he was really hurt and wants more time before we talk again. A month after I broke up with him, I wrote a letter very long one saying that I acc broke up with him to give him space and not cuz I didn’t like him or something. I said I still have feelings for him and want to date him. Next day he told me that the letter was nice and that it made him happy. He said that he still likes me and I still wants to date me. But needs time to get his life back on track. And I asked how much time and he said idk. He ignores me at school everyday, he seems genuinely happier than when we were in a relationship. I have a feeling he didn’t really mean it when he said he still likes me so I’m not sure if he meant anything he said since he avoids all the places I go to, he stopped talking to any of my friends, he laughs a lot more now, I want him to be happy. I don’t if I was toxic to him because he smiles a lot more now, should I just let him be? I am not sure if he will ever talk to me again, my friends told me to move on, I’m so confused how to do that since I see him everyday..

    • Your friends have shared their thoughts and feelings with you. The two of you have ended this relationship previously. His behaviors are indications that he is not interested in maintaining a relationship. Focus your emotional energy elsewhere. Determine what you want for your future without him. He may reach out to you in the future. Have a great day, Lia!

  17. My boyfriend broke up with me because he thinks I love to start drama.When reality I just only told him what happened but he went to confront the girl. He blames me for her back lashing abt the situation when he didn’t have to contact her in the first place. He also wanted to be done because I usually vent to my friends and try to get guidance. My friend became angry because he mentions her everytime we argue. So she confronted him but he blames me for wt she did when all I did was tell what happened. Everybody says I’m not in the wrong and that he is I know this. We are not talking, he took me off Snapchat but still has me on Twitter, instagram, and Facebook, what could that mean? Just him wanting to see what I’m doing or not losing all of his feelings for me? He has cheated on me more than once by talking to multiple girls and received oral from 2 girls while we were together, but I forgave him and was willing to work on it with him. But he dumps me for something little? Plz help

    • He has chosen to disrespect you. He is not interested in nourishing a romantic relationship with you. Determine what you want for the future of this relationship. Decide what you believe is appropriate for your future. Speak with him about your thoughts and feelings. Perhaps allow thoughts of him to fade. Have a great day, Janay!

  18. I need help I met a guy on fb and we talked about 2 months or 3 and he broke up with me I stayed calm and let him to leave I didn’t said a word to make him stay now it’s been almost 60 days we are not in contact he blocked me before deactivating his account in these 60 days I didn’t text him I am quite and trying to forget him but I am failing miserably I just want to know will he ever regret his decision and text me again or not what guys feel after breaking someone’s heart do they also get hurt when they’re one to breakup

    • He has decided to end this relationship. He has blocked you. He is not interested in maintaining a relationship with you. He likely will not reach out to you. Your relationship ended two months ago, so you will find great benefit in focusing your emotional energy elsewhere. Share your kindness and compassion with the world, as this will help cause positive people and energy to enter into your life. Have a great day, Emily!

  19. Hi,
    I met a guy on Tinder and we were talking 24/7 for about 3 months before we got together. He told me before we got together that he had just found out that his ex was pregnant with his baby but we decided to get together anyway and see how things go as we both had strong feelings for each other. We were together almost 3 months and we both decided to end things mutually about a month and a half ago. We agreed that we still wanted to be part of each others lives in some way, as friends maybe, because we really didn’t want to break up with each other but we knew we had to for our own sakes. A couple of weeks after the breakup he blocked me on all social media and blocked my phone number. I got in contact with him using someone else’s phone and pleaded with him to unblock me. He eventually did and we met up and talked things out and he explained why he blocked me and apologized. We ended this meeting on good terms and then about a week later he blocked me again. Its been 2 weeks now and I’m still blocked. He was my first boyfriend and I’m having a really hard time dealing with this and trying to move on. I keep fighting the urge to text him from a friend’s phone but I know he’ll just block that and I don’t want to harass him. He told me several times he still wanted to have me be a part of his life after we broke up so I can’t wrap my head around why he’d do this. Do you think there’s a chance he’ll ever get in contact with me again?

    • He has blocked you, unblocked you, shared his feelings with you, and blocked you again. It is certain that his partner is influencing his actions. He is in a relationship and attempting to care for his child. Do not reach out to him at this time. Focus your emotional energy elsewhere at this time. Determine what you want for your future without him. Have a great day, Liz!

  20. I met this guy, same age as mine, on a dating site. We were shown to be a whooping 96% match. He is the most genuine person that I have met so far. He told his mother about me. He got himself an SMS pack to stay in touch because I didn’t have a smartphone back then. He went up to brush his teeth at my insistence right at the end of our first week, in the cold month of January at 2.30 a.m. and so on. But I couldn’t believe my luck because I had had a lot of unpleasant experiences with men, so I was apprehensive about him and kept asking him questions in order to pacify my fears..which hurt his ego after a point of time… And then he decided enough has been said.. and decided to quit. That was 2 years and 3 months ago… He never pardoned me… I kept waiting for him these 2 years..and I still can’t get over him..I am deeply embarrassed for messing things up..I was taking things for granted back then and never understood his sincerity regarding me..he blocked me on Facebook.. I emailed him but never got any reply.. I tried to contact his friends but they turned me down..he just refused to give me any more chance at all..I tried everything.. From couriering a self-made huge charcoal portrait of his, to sending him self-recorded songs, to trying to call…nothing helped ..he is the most wonderful person I have seen and it was he who was totally keen about me when we were together.. I have looked everywhere for help- of any kind.. to no avail.. Can you help me, please?

    • I had deleted his contact and everything in order to get over everything, but that didn’t work. Then a few days back I got in touch with his cousin brother and got hold of his number again.. WhatsApp-ed him for the first time, asking for one final conversation, but he wrote back similar lengthy response explaining why he doesn’t think we have anything to talk about. That’s how I heard from him again, after 2 whole years, only repeating the things that I heard from him the last time, 2 years back. I had made 2 of my friends get in touch with him on Facebook in the meantime, with the aim of their facilitating my chance of a conversation with him.Though they hadn’t revealed their relations with me to him, and neither their intentions, he had perfectly fine and decent hi-hello’s exchanged with them(nothing more happened,as I asked my friends to hold back and wait). But now he texted me that IG I continue trying to force a conversation with him, he will be left with no choice but blocking me in WhatsApp, and blocking my friends too who I have made to connect with him. Why did he then accept their requests and reciprocate, if he was well aware of the scheme behind it? No matter how many times I promise myself that I will never again try to get back to him, I inevitably start feeling my resolve crumbling inside, every time, .. His name is at the tip of my tongue at every waking moment, in the subconscious,.. I took him for granted/took his words with a pinch of salt when we were together.. But after he left, at one stroke did I realize what had I lost..

      • It sounds as though you are aware that this relationship is no longer viable. You continue to feel a strong emotional connection with this person. Focus your emotional energy elsewhere. Spend additional time with your friends and family. Determine what you want for your future without him. Have a great day, Chaitali!

    • He has explained that he is no longer interested in maintaining a relationship with you. You are aware of his reasons for doing so. He has blocked you. You have attempted to contact him and he still does not want to speak with you. Allow thoughts of him to fade. Focus your emotional energy elsewhere. Learn your lesson from this relationship. Have a great day, Chaitali!

  21. My boyfriend ended a year and a half relationship (we had been long distance for the last 8 months of it). We had been having a lot of argument where I would cry because he kept using insensitive language that I hated (making autism jokes and more). I always forgave him and he always promised to change because he loved me. I admit I was being very moody, and in the last argument, I went too far and said something small about his personality I didn’t like (he never listened but waited for his turn to talk but I said it more harshly). This triggered into him thinking I can’t love him for who he is. A week later, he decided he didn’t love me, he had feelings for another girl and told her and broke up with me. But it seems like he just sought her comfort because we were fighting so often than anything actually real. I was very gracious in the breakup because I loved him. He cried harder than I did, which made me think he still had feelings for me. He said he still liked everything about me, and he always told me before I was His soulmate. He still liked my posts on Instagram and was the first to watch my Snapchat stories. I blocked him to show that the way he treated me, I can’t just forgive him. He never apologized. I don’t want to be with him, but I want him to reach out, realize that he threw away a good thing, and apologize so that I can move on. I feel like I have had no justice and I just sit here to be the bigger person. Will he ever realize his feelings for me again?

    • It is likely that eight months of a long distance relationships caused his feelings to change over time. His behaviors were unacceptable, especially as you spoke with him about your thoughts and feelings. You have blocked him and are aware that you no longer want to nourish a relationship with him. Determine what actions you believe are appropriate for your future. Have a great day, Kelly!

      • Thank you for the reply!! Can I ask you if you think it’s a bad idea to reach out to him a month after no contact (if he never reaches out to me?) I feel like I need to forgive to move on but don’t want to make a fool of myself if he doesn’t even care. He loved me a lot, so I feel that he would, but the week he broke up with me, he had been a very careless person.

        • Do not concern yourself with making a fool of yourself. Determine what you want for your future and take appropriate action. However, he has not contacted with you and you are aware that he has been careless. Perhaps you will find benefit in allowing thoughts of him to fade. Share your kindness and compassion with everyone in your life. Have a great day, Kelly!

  22. My boyfriend ended a year and a half relationship (we had been long distance for the last 8 months of it). We had been having a lot of argument where I would cry because he kept using insensitive language that I hated (making autism jokes and more). I always forgave him and he always promised to change because he loved me. I admit I was being very moody, and in the last argument, I went too far and said something small about his personality I didn’t like (he never listened but waited for his turn to talk). This triggered into him thinking I can’t love him for who he is. A week later, he decided he didn’t love me, he had feelings for another girl and told her and broke up with me. But it seems like he just sought her comfort because we were fighting so often than anything actually real. I was very gracious in the breakup because I loved him. He cried harder than I did, which made me think he still had feelings for me. He said he still liked everything about me, and he always told me before I was His soulmate. He liked my posts on Instagram and was the first to watch my Snapchat stories. I blocked him to show that the way he treated me, I can’t just forgive him. He never apologized. I don’t want to be with him, but I want him to reach out, realize that he threw away a good thing, and apologize so that I can move on. I feel like I have had no justice and I just sit here to be the bigger person.

    • It is likely that eight months of a long distance relationships caused his feelings to change over time. His behaviors were unacceptable, especially as you spoke with him about your thoughts and feelings. You have blocked him and are aware that you no longer want to nourish a relationship with him. Determine what actions you believe are appropriate for your future. Have a great day, Kelly!

  23. Hi, Thankyou for the article… I will make my simple. We have been dating for 2 months. Fell completely in love with each other. Mostly all magic special memories. Lots of similarities. Planning for the future. The last week before the break up was great. As usual. But he lost his job, one he just got. And he already had stress about his bills. He was fine when he came home ( we live apart but I was with him). Didn’t show me any sign of anxiety. When I left a couple days after, that night he was out with a friend. I got impatient because I wasnt really hearing from him quickly, something I’m not used to and gave him a “ good job dude”. Next morning he was upset about my response and I said “ nope I’m good”. This ruined everything. He didn’t reach out for a couple of days at all. I reached out to him wanting to get over it and explain why I was upset. But he wanted time to himself. I still tried explaining myself and that it’s okay if he needs time, just important to communicate that. He started getting irritated and with very minimal responses said some things I found hurtful. Honestly I just haven’t seen this side to him nor understood what bought it on this deeply so I broke up with him. He only replied “ ok. I think we rushed things a bit”. I only sent a peaceful message the next day that I hope he gets through whatever he needs to and it’s all love here and I wish him the best and begun no contact. But I still haven’t heard anything. It’s been a week. He doesn’t watch my insta stories anymore. I’m so shocked because we were going so well. I really believe he is stressed and going into a man cave till he feels better. But… well I hope for that. Any thoughts? Obviously I made it worse since I was the one who broke things. This added to the stress and sense of failure… we were going so freaking good though.
    So many good memories, and fresh new love. He’s a fool if he doesn’t later. Lol but I’ve learned my lesson about space. If he does reach out in a week or a couple he will have to learn to communicate better.

    • You decided to end this relationship. The two of you have not spoken in a week. You are aware that this relationship is no longer viable. Learn from this lesson to ensure that your future relationships are successful. Allow thoughts of him to fade. Determine what you want for your future without him. Have a great day, Saadi!

  24. Hi,
    So basically..
    I have just come out of a short relationship however we were very close – so I met this guy off tinder as you do and from the day we met we had an instant connection, we share the same birthday but two years apart (I know creepy ), we have the same interests, dislikes, likes and same out look on life. Honesty we had the best 2-3 months of our lives we never argued, everything was so good!
    So the reason why we split was because he’s training to be a paramedic and his course right now is stressful. During the process of the breakup ( which btw only happened over a week ago), he told me that he didn’t want to break up with me at all but he felt it was the right thing to do & that he still adored me and thought there was something special about me and he still thinks that.
    So during the process of the breakup, I’ve been super super calm I haven’t cried down the phone I haven’t sent him abuse or anything. I totally understand his decision and fully respect him for it and if anything I’m super proud that he’s pursuing his career.
    We have spoken every day and some days we’ve had little tiffs but the other days it’s been fine, because I have found it so hard to not talk to him if that makes sense?
    So recently we had a nice chat after a day or so of me having a good old think and I told him that I’m never gonna be mad at him, I’m never gonna hate him, I’m just slightly upset by what he’s done and that I didn’t want to be the person to stand in the way of his career if anything I want to the the person who will stand by him and support him whatever the situation.
    Anyway I’ve got some stuff of his at my house and I’ve asked him if he wants me to come and give them to him and he’s said along the lines of ‘ no you maybe wanna keep hold of them for now “ and he was flirting with me you know banter and all that. Which is fine.
    He’s said I’m not going to say no to getting back together with you in the future I’m just saying maybe – but you know when someone says maybe but it sounds like a yes? it was like that.

    Anyway – since then he’s now blocked me on Facebook and tbh I don’t really use it that often and neither does he, I’ve still got him other social media’s etc. & yeah he went out last night and he didn’t answer his phone one bit and I went in to panic and thought omg he’s blocked my number too so of course I rang him loads – turns out he had gone out but turned his phone off – which he never ever does.
    And we both said to save our friendship right now is to not speak every day however we haven’t spoken since Saturday ( today being Wednesday) and I want to talk to him so badly but I haven’t messaged at all!!
    So I wanna know do you believe that we could get back together?
    And can it be the right people but just at the wrong time?

    • The two of you share a strong emotional connection. He has shared his thoughts and feelings with you. He is too busy to maintain a relationship with you at this time. He may want to nourish a relationship with you in the future. The two of you have decided to speak less often, so give him an opportunity to reach out to you. Perhaps attempt to reach out to him in a few days. Have a great day, Hermione!

  25. We started dating after his recent break up from the mother of his child. Fell for each other. She then decided she wanted to give things another go and i tried to walk away but he couldn’t let me saying he really saw a future with me and we just had to be patient while he sorted this out. Then out if nowhere he contacted me saying he really cares and wishes we met at a different time but right now maybe it’s best he tries for his child’s sake one more time. I was nice at first and understanding. Then I sent a message saying he had messed with my head and string me along not being honest, I doubted he ever felt anything or saw a future. This was 3 days ago and I have not heard anything since. I’m assuming he is now happy and maybe he never did feel anything for me. Do I just go through the hurt and let him go or will he ever cobtact me and maybe realise what we had was real?

    • He has shared his thoughts and feelings with you. He is attempting to nourish a relationship with the mother of his child to support the development of his child. He may have felt something for you, but he is choosing to focus on his child. Allow thoughts of him to fade. Focus your emotional energy elsewhere at this time. Have a great day, Jade!

  26. This guy and I have always had an unexplainable bond to where we feel close to each other no matter how much time has passed, but I never thought he had serioUs feelings. I am going through a divorce and when we recently spoke he told me that he has loved me for over 10 years and he never got married because he felt I was his soulmate and it crushed him when I got married. Since I am divorcing we met and the feelings and chemistry between us was intense. But he is very uncomfortable with the divorce not being final. He said he struggles with it. He said he wanted something with me but he didn’t know what that could look like right now. He pulled back and was no longer complimenting me or texting me as often and canceled plans a couple of times. So I told him I felt like he was ignoring me and not even treating me like a good friend. He told me this was stressful and hasn’t talked to me since. I contacted him the next day to apologize for my actions and did not hear anything for 4 days so I wrote a note telling him how I felt about him and how I felt about my marriage and have not heard anything back from that. It has been a week. I feel terrible because I valued his friendship so much and I do love him. Will he ever talk to me again?

    • He is interested in nourishing a relationship with you. He does not want to maintain a relationship with you while you are married. Finalize your divorce and reach out to him. Continue to share your kindness and compassion with him. Perhaps attempt to spend additional time with him in person. Have a great day, Minh!

  27. My girlfriend of 6 months broke up with me after an argument. It was a long distance relationship. I went to the UK for my Masters when I met her and it went well while we were together for that six months. I left back to my country because my visa was going to expire and she promised to visit me in my country so we can get marry and be together. Also, she is an independent lady with good job and house. Four weeks after I returned to my country, we had an argument and she broke up with me. The way she broke up with me was cruel because she didn’t speak nor return my calls before she eventually broke up with me but refused to block me on whatsapp. I tried to make her change my mind but she insisted on breaking up. I went on no contact rule and after a while, I got In touch with her because she got pregnant for me and later lost the baby. I got in touch with her on WhatsApp and we chatted about what happened. Later that day, I saw a message from her saying “I love you and I’m sorry for everything”… I responded to her that what’s more important is for her to get over this period and be stronger after we can talk about everything. She read my response as but didn’t reply. I went on no contact rule again and after like 3weeks, I saw a message from her saying “Good morning, I hope all is well with you. Have a blessed day”. I replied to her message after like 4hours but she read my messge and didn’t reply. Please I’m confused. Does this mean she wants to get back or she is just checking on me.

    • It sounds as though the two of you are aware that your relationship has ended due to distance and neither of you are able to maintain this relationship successfully. Each of you care for each other. Continue to share your kindness and compassion with her. In the future, you may find that this relationship may be potentially successful. Have a great day, Olawale!

  28. I just broke up with my bf its been just more than a week ! he called me up by the end of the week and said that he was missing me ! he seems to be certain about the break up but I just want to have some more fun ! I am okay with a break up but I just want to have some more fun ! I made a stupid mistake I messaged him that ! and he hasnt replied yet ! 🙁 he often remains busy and once before we did break up because of his work pressure and turst issues from my side ! but then he made it upto me ! he would respond to all my msgs he became very regular and now I can trust him ! but I think he doesnt want a relationship ! what should I do ! ? Cause I really miss him ! really I do !

    • You have shared your thoughts and feelings with him. Allow him time to respond. You will find benefit in listening to his response. Ensure that you share your kindness and compassion with him. Perhaps determine what you want for your emotional relationships in the future. Have a great day, Gona!

  29. Comment: What are the chances that he will miss me and come back after he said he’s not ready for a relationship pls? I’m doing no contact and during this period, he has messaged and called

    • He has shared his thoughts and feelings with you. Each person keeps to their decisions differently. Determine what you want for your future. Decide what you believe is viable. Speak with him about your thoughts and feelings. Give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Have a great day, R.G.!

  30. Comment: Please, what are the chances that he will miss me and come back after saying he’s not ready for a relationship. I’m doing no contact and during this period, he messaged and called. I really love this guy and as much as I want to let go, a part of me want to give it a try.

    • He has shared his thoughts and feelings with you. Each person keeps to their decisions differently. Determine what you want for your future. Decide what you believe is viable. Speak with him about your thoughts and feelings. Give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Have a great day, R.G.!

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